Caged Roses, Forbidden Lilies
by Zane's Girl- Jo
Summary: Sisters. The boys fascinated with them. When four girls become the center of an obsession & deadly pact, it leaves Shiz University reeling. For Elphaba, Glinda, Milla & Nessa are four girls who change the way you think, & how you look & deal with death...
1. Chapter 1

**Caged Roses, Forbidden Lilies**

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Summary: Sisters. Best friends. And the boys fascinated with them. College is supposed to be a time to experience, a time for adventure, not for death and tragedy. So when four girls become the center of an obsession and a deadly pact, it leaves the whole of Shiz University reeling. For Elphaba, Glinda, Milla and Nessarose are four girls who change the way you think, and how you look and deal with death..... **

******Love. Sex. Death. Passion. Fear. Obsession. **

******Just Like Life.**

It was during our second year at Shiz University that the trouble began.

It centered- from beginning to tragic end- around four of the most mysterious, most beautiful girls at Shiz University: Milla Qyte, Glinda Upland, and the Thropp sisters, Elphaba and Nessarose. Elphaba and Milla were the oldest, both at age twenty-one, Glinda was nineteen, and Nessa was the youngest at eighteen. The girls were best friends, sisters, both blood and non-blood related; Elphaba and Milla were roommates, and Glinda and Nessa both lived in the dorm the freshmen and sophomores shared.

I guess you could say we became fascinated with the girls when school started, back when Milla and Elphaba were freshmen- we knew them, sharing the same classes, going to the same school, listening to the same lectures- but we never really _knew_ them. They were forbidden, not allowed to associate with the males in the class, all had domineering parents who made sure their daughters stayed away from us.

Those first few days of class, we'd watch Milla and Elphaba at the front, taking notes or talking softly together. Two girls, who looked so different, yet so beautiful, who were so unattainable, became specimen, something to be studied from afar. And study them we did. They were polar opposites in looks and personalities, but got along well. Milla, with her short red hair and green eyes talked and smiled, chattering even when we were in class. And Elphaba, with her green skin, long, raven hair and deep, violet eyes, was as quiet and soft-spoken as Milla was outgoing.

We first met the girls one afternoon during lunch- or, rather, Fiyero Tiggular, Prince of the Vinkus, met Elphaba.

Not that he didn't know her, but he'd never spoken a word to her until the cafeteria incident. He accidentally ran into her as she was heading to the table she and Milla were sitting at. The impact caused the coffee on her tray to splash all over her, drenching her in liquid, and the salad to hit her chest, leaving a lettuce and dressing on her shirt as the rest landed on the floor. She didn't say a word, just looked at the spilled coffee and salad, before locking eyes with him. Of course, Fiyero couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't see you." Quickly, he began to clean the coffee and salad off her shirt. "I.... I'm Fiyero."

She pulled away, and brushed her bangs from her eyes, looking him up and down, a small frown on her face.

"I know who you are. You sit next to me in Ozian Literature." He nodded.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."

Without another word, she stormed over to Milla, who grabbed her arm, and led her from the cafeteria, shooting an angry glance at Fiyero. Everyone watched as the girls disappeared behind the double doors, and once they were gone, the whole cafeteria erupted in chatter. Elphaba rarely said _two words _in class, and here, in front of everyone, she'd said a whole sentence- two whole sentences. As soon as we could, we hurried over to Fiyero, who hadn't moved from where they'd slammed into each other.

"She spoke. She _actually_ spoke to you." Fiyero just nodded, and turned to look at the double doors.

After lunch, we gathered outside on the green to discuss the phenomenon of Elphaba _actually_ opening her mouth and _actually _saying something. She never said anything to anyone, not even the teachers, and only ever talked to Milla, as the girls were roommates. We knew that Elphaba had a younger sister and a young brother, and we knew that Milla had a close cousin, one of the Uplands, but they were too young to be at Shiz. Elphaba was the oldest daughter of the Govenor of Munchkinland, where both she and Milla were from, and both girls had overbearing and protective parents, that they were watched at school, not allowed to associate or do anything 'wild'. Beyond that, we knew very little of them or their lives, and we craved for more.

"She's... exotic. Different. And not just her skin... it's everything about her. I've sat next to her in Ozian Lit for three months, and she _hasn't said _two words to or even _looked_ at me since school started. And then....." He trailed off, indicating the incident in the cafeteria moments earlier, and turned to look over his shoulder- the girls were heading to their Mathematics class, arms linked. Neither looked our way, instead they talked quietly together. "She's.... beautiful. Absolutely beautiful."

Once they made it to the Karqu Building, Milla pulled the door open and entered; Elphaba caught the door and moved to go inside, when suddenly, she turned back, looking at us. Her eyes locked on Fiyero's, and she stared at him for several minutes. Then, Milla came back, grabbed Elphaba's hand, and pulled her into the building, and all we could do was watch the door close behind her.


	2. Love

_**Love**_

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Thanks to ShortieJMW, Hedwig466, Issa(dot)wicked17, and lizziemagic for reviewing the first chapter. **

After that day, we tried so hard to get the girls to speak to us, to no avail. Only Fiyero seemed to have any luck.

He sat next to Elphaba during Ozian Literature, and most of the time, she spent it talking to Milla, or working on the classwork. So Fiyero was startled to feel something poke him in the side. His head snapped up, and he quickly scanned the room, before turning to see Elphaba, who propped her head on her knuckles as she worked on her classwork. Slowly, his eyes landed on the pen laying forgotten on her desk, tip pointed towards him.

He didn't say anything, just watched her, when she slowly looked up at him. Her deep violet eyes locked on his, and glanced down at her schoolwork, before looking back at him. They started a series of silent conversations, of nods and sighs, communicating without speaking. She sighed, and sat up, tossing her head and turning to the front. Fiyero never took his eyes off her, and she glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. When he returned to his work, she slowly slid the pen towards him, and poked him again.

He looked up just as she replaced the pen on her desk.

Years later, as we ran our companies and raised our families, Fiyero, who had by then turned his back on the crown and taken a job as a lawyer in the Emerald City, would remember their silent conversations as he nursed a caffeine addiction and sorted through his endless case files.

"She was wild, just from the look in her eyes. Coy and unmanagable at the same time. She was.... sexual in every sense of the word, even though she didn't show it."

His sapphire eyes held that look of wonder as he spoke, as though he were being transported back to that day in Ozian Lit, with Elphaba sitting next to him, poking him in the side with her pen and sighing as she caught his eyes through her lashes. He swirled the coffee in his cup, leaning back in his chair as he spoke about it.

"Those fucking parents of hers kept her under lock and key, even from a distance. They did it with all those girls- Milla, Glinda, Nessa, Elphaba. Wouldn't let them grow up. They suffocated them, even though they were in college. I see it all the time. Parents think they can control their kids by forbidding them from doing things, and in the end, they lose their children anyway. Mainly it's runaways and murder, never.... never suicide."

Suicide was exceedingly rare, murder was more common. No one wanted to attempt suicide, not after.....

"I've never gotten over her. How could I? She was a vision. An absolute vision."

Fiyero was right, Elphaba was a vision, a beauty in a sea of sameness. She was unique, her trademark braid tossed over her shoulder, the black bookbag she carried always at her side. Her violet eyes sparked in the light, and she kept her head down half the time, except when she was talking with Milla. It was normal to see her sitting under the cherry tree by the Suicide Canal, Milla at her side, as the two ate lunch or shared a cup of coffee.

She was vibrant when she was with her roommate, she talked and laughed, and Milla calmed down, taking on aspects of Elphaba's personality. It was as though the girls switched personas when they were together. So it was one afternoon, not long after the cafeteria incident, that Fiyero slowly approached the girls as they sat under the cherry tree during lunch.

"No. Pink is definatley _not_ my color." Elphaba said, taking a sip of her coke.

"Well, did you write her back and tell her so?" Milla asked. Elphaba nodded, her braid bouncing gently against her back with the movement. Silent, we watched as Fiyero got closer to the girls.

"Nessie doesn't seem to get it. I'm not the kind of girl that wears _pink_. That's more your cousin Glinda's color."

"Hmm, did I tell you? Aunt Katila and Uncle Oscar are going to let Glinda go to Shiz when she graduates." Elphaba shook her head, as she tore a bite of her sandwich off.

"No. You didn't. Really? When does she graduate?"

"Next year." Milla replied, as Elphaba popped the bite into her mouth. "She'll be eighteen." Elphaba nodded.

"Well then, Nessie can give Glinda the pink sweater, because there is no way in hell- I'm_ not wearing _it." Elphaba said, taking another sip of her cola.

"Um... Elphaba?" She looked up, her violet eyes turning to Fiyero. The conversation stopped, as both girls watched and waited for Fiyero to speak. He stumbled over his words for several minutes, before finally forming a coherent, slowly-spoken sentence. "D.... do you... want to go get a cup of coffee after class?"

She started, her eyes widening in shock at the boldness of his question. After a moment, her teeth grasped her bottom lip, and she turned to Milla, who shrugged.

"I don't think that would be smart. If my father found out....."

"But your father's not here. He wouldn't have to find out." Fiyero interjected.

"You don't know our parents. Fabala's father and my parents don't let us associate with.... your sex." Milla said, choosing her words carefully and shooting Fiyero a sympathetic glance. He nodded.

"Maybe next time, then." Elphaba nodded, but her eyes had lost hope that there would be a "next time." After a moment, he excused himself, and joined us. "How would their parents know if they went out on a date, what do they have spies positioned in the school?" Fiyero asked once he reached us. Little did we know, that three days later, the Govenor of Munchkinland recieved a phone call from a woman, telling him about the "boy that had approached his daughter."


	3. Chapter 3

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: She (Elphaba) committed suicide?**

**Answer: I'm not saying**

**Question: The suicide thing?...that's what's going to happen?**

**Answer: I'm not saying, you'll have to read for yourselves**

**Thanks to Hedwig466, ShortieJMW, and Wicked'elphaba-fiyero for reviewing the second chapter. **

"Miss Thropp!"

Everyone looked up, to see the headmistress, a giant fish of a woman, Madame Morrible, hurrying to catch up with Elphaba and Milla during lunch. The two girls stopped and waited, and slowly, everyone returned to their activities; we pretended to be deep in conversation, and watched them out of the corners of our eyes. However, Morrible didn't stay to discuss the topic in the middle of the lawn, instead, she led both girls back to her office.

Behind the closed doors, we wouldn't have known what was discussed, if it hadn't been for Tersan Sey, a young man known for his smoking habit and his record of skipping class, who was waiting to talk to Morrible about his expulsion. When we talked to him years later, he was being waiting arraignment for a case of treason in Southstairs, yet he, like Fiyero- like all of us- never forgot those girls, with their exotic eyes and their quiet smiles.

"That bitch Morrible was trying to scare them, and I have to say she was doing a damn good job of it. Even Milla stopped protesting when she realized she wasn't going to win. I swear, that woman sucked the life out of you, just by looking your way. She wanted to destroy those girls- and not just Elphaba and Milla, but Glinda and Nessa when they came to Shiz. Anything vibrant and beautiful, she wanted to suck the life out of."

And sitting there, outside the slightly cracked office door, he realized that Morrible was doing just that, but instead of bursting in, he focused on the conversation inside, while pretending to admire the paintings on the walls. Both girls were sitting in front of Morrible, who sat behind her desk, two letters in front of her.

"Your parents wrote me. They-"

"Wait, both our parents, or just Fabala's?" Milla asked. Morrible looked at her.

"Why, your parents wrote me as well, Miss Qyte." Milla paled.

"About what, Madame?" Elphaba whispered. Silently, Tersan sidled up to the door, and peered through the crack.

"Both of you were seen being approached by a young man on Monday. A.... Master Tiggular." Morrible said, reading the name. Elphaba ducked her head, embarrassed. "Now,_ both _of you are under strict orders to stay away from the young men. Your father's don't want you associating with Master Tiggular or any other young man at this school. I'll overlook it just this once, but from now on, you're to follow your parents' orders, understood?"

"Yes Madame." They whispered in unison. When they were allowed to go, Tersan hurried back to the chair he'd been sitting in, and watched as the girls hurried out of the office, arms linked, Elphaba's head down, allowing Milla to lead her away.

"They both looked like they'd been caught with their hands in the cookie jar. Guilty. Suddenly, my expulsion problem didn't look so major next to theirs."

Of course, when Fiyero found out that he'd been spied talking to both girls, that just made him more determined than ever to ask Elphaba out. Safe to say, Fiyero developed a crush on her, and he wanted so much to take her in his arms and kiss her. But all he could do, was content himself with sitting next to her in Ozian Lit, and talk to her silently throughout class. But when class ended, and Elphaba got up to go, Fiyero saw his chance, and grabbed her arm, causing her to turn.

"Elphaba?" She met his eyes, before slowly pulling away.

"I'm sorry, Fiyero."

"Is this about-"

"We're not s....upposed to talk to you." Milla said, joining Elphaba and grabbing her arm. "I'm sorry." After a moment, she gently tugged Elphaba away, and the two left.

"I'm sorry." Elphaba whispered, as they left the classroom. Fiyero followed however, refusing to be shot down.

"Elphaba! Elphaba, please! All I'm asking is if we can go out for a cup of coffee!"

"I know that! And I told you, I can't! Neither Milla nor I!" She snapped, glancing over her shoulder at him as they crossed the green, before they disappeared into Crage Hall, leaving Fiyero in the middle of the sidewalk.

That didn't deter him any, instead, it just made Fiyero try harder to get her attention. From games of footsie under the desks, to notes on her lunch tray, to just short of climbing through her dorm window, Fiyero did all he could to get her to talk to him. And that's where we found him on his latest venture: standing outside Elphaba and Milla's dorm room in the middle of the night, tossing pebbles at her window.

"Elphaba!"

From our vantage point across from the dorm, sitting on the roof of Briscoe Hall, we saw Fiyero's vain attempt to get her to come to the window. After several minutes of pebble throwing and calling her name, the window opened, and Milla stuck her head out. Even from this distance, their voices were loud and clear.

"Go away, Fiyero!"

"I just want to talk to her!"

"You can't! It's forbidden!" Then, the window slammed down, leaving Fiyero stunned, yet no less determined to give up. So he continued- for an hour- to try to get Elphaba's attention. And just as we were preparing to leave, the window again opened.

_"What do you want?"_

Elphaba had stuck her head out the window, and now peered down at Fiyero, who relaxed when he realized it was her.

"Come here."

"No. I can't."

"Please, Elphaba, we need to talk!"

_"I said no!"_

_"Please!"_

After a moment, she groaned, but gave in.

"All right! Give me a minute!"

And then we watched, as she climbed out the window- until Milla grabbed her arm. They argued for a moment, before Milla released her, and Elphaba pushed herself off the windowsill. For several terrifying moments, we thought she'd bash her brains on the pavement, but only breathed a sigh of relief when Fiyero caught her. Then, he set her on her feet, took her hand, and led her into the bushes.


	4. Chapter 4

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: who exactly is the narrator?**

**Answer: well, essentially, it's Avaric, Boq, Crope, Tibbett, and Fiyero that are narrating, although every so often, the others will narrate about an encounter one of their group had with the girls (like Fiyero's encounters with Elphaba)**

**Thanks to Hedwig466 and lizziemagic for reviewing the third chapter. **

Fiyero didn't say anything about what happened in the bushes outside Crage Hall that night, and it wasn't until years later, when we were interviewing him in his office, that he even managed to remember that long ago evening. A bachelor the rest of his life, he always said he couldn't possibly have married, because his heart belonged to Elphaba, and Elphaba alone.

Even though by now, she was gone; her bones slowly turning to dust.

"She asked me if I wanted to get myself killed, and after a moment, I grabbed her and kissed her. She pushed me away, before continuing the kiss. I've kissed girls before, but never anyone like Elphaba. She didn't just kiss.... she loved. _Completely and absolutely loved_. I wasn't just kissing her, I was making love to her- in a sense. We spent an hour in that bush, kissing."

By the time they'd finished, Elphaba was laying beneath him, cradling his head in her hands, and slowly, she pushed him off her, sitting up and brushing her bangs out of her face.

"I'd better go. Milla will be worried, and if I get caught, my father will pull me out of Shiz." She whispered, pulling away and climbing out of the bush.

We saw her clamber out of the leaves and twigs, and then silently scale the dorm wall to her window on the second floor. She knocked, and the window opened, revealing a worried Milla, who quickly pulled her inside and slammed the window shut, just as Fiyero reached the sidewalk. Their silhouettes were seen in the window before the light flicked off, and everything went dark.

Several days later, we found Elphaba and Milla sitting under the cherry tree during lunch, talking. Every so often, Elphaba would look up and catch Fiyero's eye, smiling at him before ducking her head quickly in embarrassment. Milla rolled her eyes and quickly glanced around, before her eyes landed on Madame Morrible walking across the green. Quickly, she tugged on Elphaba's arm, and the two gathered up their things, and rushed off towards their Mathematics class, just reaching the door when Morrible made it to the cherry tree. Slowly, Avaric got up, gathered his books, and followed the girls; he shared Mathematics with both Milla and Elphaba.

We only learned later on that Avaric had slipped a note to Milla, who showed it to Elphaba, starting a three-way conversation with both girls, which he saved and we later examined, looking at their replies to understand why they did what they did:

**Are you two okay? What's with the marathon whenever Horrible Morrible comes around? You just seem jumpy. Both of you.**

You wouldn't understand.

_We can't tell you._

**I wouldn't tell anyone, you know that.**

It was a three way conversation, discussed during class, under the desk, in Avaric's messy writing, Milla's crisp short hand, and Elphaba's curvy, proper scrawl.

_How do we know you wouldn't turn on us? You hang out with Fiyero and those other idiots. And you're not exactly bright anyway. _

Elphaba!

_Well it's true! He's as bad as Tersan Sey!_

**Can we please stop discussing my mind and get back to the two of you? What's going on?**

Nothing!

_Why do all of you assume something's wrong? Don't you know that when you assume something you make an ass of you and me?_

**Very funny, Elphaba.**

Good one, Fabala.

_Thank, Mil. And as for you, Avaric, leave us alone._

**Oh come on, Elphaba! I'm just curious. I'm worried about you.**

You never cared about us before. Why now? Why are we so important to you now?

**You're both my friends.**

_And not just you, but Fiyero also. All of you in fact- Boq, Crope, Tibbett- it's like we're some fantasy of yours._

**Of course not. Why would you be? You're both perfect. Absolutely perfect.**

_Yeah right. Thanks for the lie. _

**It's not a lie. It's.... a way of looking at things differently.**

_Yeah right._

Elphaba! I'm sure it's true.

_How could it be true Milla? He's just saying it to get us to go out with him._

Like when you disappeared in the bushes with Fiyero?

_How did you-_

How could I not know? You were covered in leaves and twigs.

**Do you two always-**

Nothing was revealed about their intentions, just a conversation held secretly during class. The conversation ends there, as class ended, and the girls quickly left, leaving Avaric behind. We saw him hurrying to catch up with them as they crossed the green.

"Hey! Hey, wait!"

Elphaba quickly turned to look back at him.

"Go away!"

He grabbed her arm.

"Let go of me and leave us alone!" Elphaba cried, smacking him hard before she wrenched her arm away. Then, she pulled Milla along, leading them back to her dorm. Before Avaric could say anything else, they disappeared into the building, leaving Avaric in the green, a red mark on his cheek.


	5. Chapter 5

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: Was this narrator some sort of police or something?**

**Answer: nope, the boys are narrating the story**

**Thanks to ShortieJMW for reviewing the third and fourth chapter, and also to Issa(dot)wicked17, lizziemagic, and Hedwig466 for reviewing the fourth chapter.**

A week passed before anyone got up the courage to talk to the girls. Mainly, everyone avoided them, viewing them as lepers, as outcasts, people to be shunned. While we stayed away, we also watched them from afar, like the rest of the school did. Elphaba returned to being silent and closed off in class, and even Milla kept her mouth shut during lecture.

So it was on Friday that the two left campus, going to the Wilted Rose, the local cafe where everyone in Shiz hung out on the weekends. As we wandered through downtown Shiz, we noticed Elphaba and Milla slip into the cafe, and silently followed, taking a booth several feet from their table. Holding cups of tea, they split a cookie and whispered softly together.

It was then that Elphaba pulled the letter out of her pocket. Almost three years later, Fiyero would find that same letter in the trash in their dorm, when he went to visit her, and thinking quickly, he saved it. Written in messy scrawl, it's from Elphaba's younger brother Shell, who was ten- thirteen when she died- and still living at Colwen Grounds. Shell would later be sent away to the Sir Chuffery School for Boys here in Shiz, three weeks before his sister's suicide.

_Elba,_

_I hope everything's going good at Shiz. I miss you. I hope you can come back to Colwen Grounds for Lurlinemas, even though you don't believe in the holiday, can you still come and visit? Everything's okay here. Nessa and I miss you. Daddy not so much. And Mama..... _

_Mommy's gone, Eba. Daddy found her in their bedroom- with a vial of something called cyanide on the nightstand by the bed. Elba, what's cyanide? Daddy said it's something that makes you die quickly, but that Mama must have taken it by accident. It doesn't look like an accident, Eba. It looks like she wanted to die. _

_Daddy was going to write, but I wanted to write to you anyway, and so I offered to tell you. I don't even remember what I was originally going to say. I passed my spelling test, but other than that.... Mama's never coming back, is she, Elba? Daddy said she wasn't. He wants you to come home for her funeral, next week. I don't want to go, but Daddy says we have to. You'll come home, won't you, Eba? _

_I love you, Elba. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you. I love you._

_Love, _

_Shell_

He writes with a mix of grief, fear, and confusion. Elphaba went home the next week for her mother's funeral, and when she returned, she withdrew even further, sometimes not even talking to Milla. We've always wondered if her mother's death contributed to Elphaba's own turn at suicide, but never got the chance to ask. It certainly seems to have played a role in Elphaba's own life and death, and perhaps even in Milla's, seeing as the girls were childhood friends, and Milla considered Mrs. Thropp as a second mother.

Whatever the case, the girls became even more withdrawn, keeping closer together, and when they found themselves stranded in classrooms on the opposite ends of campus, they kept to themselves, reading or drawing, or staring off into space. As for Nessa's demise, her mother's death could very well have contributed to it, although the shock of it could have registered three years later after the death. Glinda very well could have followed her cousin's example, seeing as the two were so close.

Either way, when Elpahba returned, we tried even harder to get her attention and to get her to open up. As we later found out from ShenShen Gyr, one of Elphaba's Sorcery classmates, Elphaba had done more than just close up.

"She completely stopped. I mean completely. She didn't focus during class, and spent most of her time balancing her pencils on their points, holding them there with her mind, while everyone else practiced cloaking spells."

One one particular afternoon, Ms. Vesta, the Sorcery professor, pulled Elphaba aside during class and talked silently with her. When we interviewed her years after Elphaba's death, she was greying in the hair, laugh lines evident on her worn face. We met in the Wilted Rose, at a booth in the back corner.

"I asked her if she was feeling well, and she just looked at me for several minutes. Then she seemed to snap out of her funk and meet my gaze." She told us, sipping her tea.

"'My mother just committed suicide.' She whispered, wrapping her arms around herself. I could tell she was trying to hold back tears. 'My mama just committed suicide.' And then she backed up against the wall, slid down it, and broke into sobs. I dismissed her from class and sent her to the infirmary to talk to the nurse about a calming salve for her nerves. She never made it. One of the girls in my four fifteen class told me she saw Elphaba sitting by the suicide canal with her feet in the water, smoking."

One of the most likely scenarios as to Elphaba's demise, says that the death of her mother most likely sent her into the downward spiral that resulted in her death three years later. According to Govenor Thropp, who we managed to speak with two years after the deaths of his daughters, when he was living in a small cottage in Rush Margins, Elphaba and Mrs. Thropp were exceedingly close.

"They were mirror images of each other- except for Elphaba's green skin. But the dark hair, the violet eyes, the dazzling smile. She looked so much like Melena, it was scary. Elphaba was the only one that made Melena truly happy. She loved her family, but Elphaba was her baby. She adored that little girl so much, and she was heartbroken when Elphaba went off to college. Of course she wanted Elphaba to get an education, but still.... as to why Melena committed suicide, we'll never know. She was normal, just homesick for her oldest daughter."

He looked up when the ropes of an old tire swing snapped, sending the tire to the ground, leaving the rope hanging, swaying gently in the breeze, and he got up from his place on the steps, going to the front door. His eyes scanned the rope and he shuddered.

"I was heartbroken when I lost my wife, and evenmoreso when I lost my daughters. You never get over a loss like that. Their deaths scarred both Shell and I. That's the reason why I had to commit him- when his sisters died, they took their brother's sanity with them. He was the one that found Fabala, after all."

Then, he nodded to us, and disappeared into the house.


	6. Chapter 6

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

Elphaba just became more distant as the semester wore on, refusing to meet our gazes and keeping to herself. Milla also kept quiet, shocked by Mrs. Thropp's death; she kept close by Elphaba's side, never leaving her alone. Nothing significant happened until two days before winter break, when the girls waited for the train like the rest of us.

It was that cold, snowy afternoon, that Elphaba dragged Milla over to where we were sitting.

"Hi Fiyero."

He looked up, startled to see Elphaba standing in front of him, Milla at her side. The redhead looked nervous, and spent the time fidgeting with her gloves. She only looked up when Elphaba asked Fiyero if he wanted to go for a walk.

"Fabala, the train will be here soon. You can't go wandering off. What if they catch you and report back to your dad? Or my dad? You'll never be allowed to come back to Shiz." Elphaba met her eyes, tossing her head, so that the pom on top of her midnight blue winter beret shook slightly.

"I don't care, Mil. He can find out, I don't care. Well, do you want to, Fiyero?" She asked, turning back to him. He thought a moment, before slowly nodding.

"Sure." When he stood, she held her gloved hand out to him, which he took, and then she led him away from us, down the platform. They rounded the corner of the station house, and disappeared from view, which sent Milla into a silent frenzy. She spent the first several minutes chewing on her gloved fingers, before turning to us. Finally, Crope climbed to his feet.

"Do you want to check on them?" She nodded, whimpering. "Come on, I'll go with you." She looked at his extended hand for several minutes, before taking it.

"Th... thank you."

We watched as they followed Elphaba and Fiyero's route, finally rounding the corner. Later on, Crope told us that Fiyero and Elphaba were up against the stationhouse, kissing, and when they showed up, Elphaba pushed him away.

"What are you doing here?" Elphaba demanded.

"I didn't want to.... to..... I didn't want to be left alone." Milla replied, tears in her eyes. Elphaba sighed.

"You could have just said that then." Elphaba said, eyeing her friend before turning back to Fiyero. She captured his lips in a kiss, and pulled him closer. Crope said that it was then that Milla turned to him.

"I'm scared." She whispered. He gently cupped her cheek and met her eyes, before leaning down and capturing her lips in a gentle kiss. He said she struggled and fought, before finally giving in and letting him kiss her.

"She tasted like chocolate. Like the hot chocolate you get in the cafe at the stationhouse- the ones with the whipped cream and the cherry on top. Her kiss was sweet and bitter at the same time."

Fiyero later confirmed that Elphaba also tasted like the hot chocolate from the cafe, confirming that both girls had gotten something warm while waiting for the train.

"Once Milla calmed down, she seemed to melt into the kiss. It was like she'd never been kissed before- I think it was her first kiss. Her first and last. Because after that, she never kissed anyone again. The girls were in lockdown, so they couldn't, and then..... just as Milla pulled me closer, the train whistle blew, and we broke apart. Quickly, she wiped her mouth, grabbed Elphaba's arm, and hurried to the train, leaving Fiyero and I behind."

Once everyone had boarded the train, we searched for the compartment the girls were sitting in, and when we found it, asked them if we could join them. They agreed, but both spent most of the time watching the scenery pass by, curled up together near the window. Milla was next to the glass, and Elphaba sat next to her, curled up on the seat, her head on Milla's shoulder. They shared a blanket, and every so often, Milla would kiss Elphaba's hair like you would a child's, and we noticed once when Elphaba adjusted the blanket, that their hands were linked under the wool.

Of course, rumors swirled around the school that the girls were bi, but that turned out to not be the case. They were best friends, thought of each other as sisters, were roommates. There was nothing sexual going on between the girls, they just loved each other like family. And when Nessa and Glinda came to Shiz, Milla and Elphaba just got closer.

As the two oldest of the girls, they protected Nessa and Glinda like mother hens, but when those same mother hens took their own lives, leaving the two youngest on their own, the girls had no idea what to do. With their protectors gone and their little family torn to shreds, some say that the only thing for them to do was follow suit.

We'll never know if that's the reason Glinda and Nessa passed away, if Milla and Elphaba's deaths prompted them to take their own as well, but we do know that the deaths of their protectors and family members scarred the girls in the same way Melena's death scarred Elphaba and ultimately played a role in what was to come.

When the train stopped at Munchkinland, Elphaba and Milla gathered their things and got off the train, Boq following. He lived in Restwater, the same elite city that Milla and Elphaba lived in, on the same block as the girls, and walked with them as far as his house.

"When I got to my front door, I saw Milla and Elphaba continue down the street before going to their separate homes. They stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, hugged, and whispered something to each other. Then, Elphaba quickly kissed Milla on the lips and continued on to her house."


	7. Chapter 7

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Thanks to lizziemagic for reviewing the fifth and sixth chapter, and to Issa(dot)wicked17 and Hedwig466 for reviewing the sixth chapter.**

We've never been able to figure out what winter break was like for the girls during our first semester of college. We knew that Glinda was up visiting her cousin, and that the girls often got together during the day for snowball fights in the Thropp's front yard, because Boq said he'd look out his window to see the girls throwing snowballs, building snowmen, or making snow angels.

The only one that didn't participate much was Nessa, who was confined to a wheelchair because her legs were exceedingly weak. Elphaba though helped her sister join in the fun by helping her make snowballs and by carving out the snowmen. When they spent time standing in the snow, catching flakes on their tongues, Boq would often see one the girls- Elphaba mainly- sitting on the curb of the sidewalk in front of her house as the snow fell around her.

She'd often sit outside without a coat on, and if she did wear a coat it was unbuttoned, so she had to wrap her arms around herself to keep warm. More than once, she sat outside at night alone, looking up at the stars as the snow floated down to her. When he joined his cousins for an evening snowball fight, he rushed down the street to Elphaba's house for cover, but stopped when he heard her crying.

"She was sitting on the curb, arms around herself, shivering. Her coat was unbuttoned. She was crying. She kept saying, 'Mama' over and over. Finally, she broke into sobs and curled up on the sidewalk. She didn't care that she was getting soaked, I don't think she even cared that she'd get sick. She just kept shaking and sobbing, holding her knees to her chest and crying, 'Mama, Mama.' I would have comforted her, but just then the front door opened and her father came out, so I hightailed it back to my house."

That wasn't the only strange incident that happened during winter break. Over the course of the following week, Boq told us that Elphaba and Milla often met in the middle of the sidewalk between their houses, carrying cups of cocoa and once, a small box of some sort.

"It looked like a little girl's music box. Milla was holding it, and they sat in the middle of the sidewalk, with the box between them, and the snow falling around them, holding cups of cocoa in their hands. They didn't say much, but then Elphaba opened the box and pulled out what looked like an envelope opener that had been bent so that the blade stuck out.

After a moment, I watched her take her glove off, and then she picked up the opener and slid it over each of her fingertips, before running it vertical and horizontal down her palm. Her hand started bleeding. Milla removed the other glove, and she did the same to the other hand, before handing it to Milla, who removed her own gloves and repeated the process on her own hands.

Once she was done, she set the opener down, and squeezed her hands shut. Blood dropped into her cup, and she took a sip. Elphaba did the same, before they finally took hands and pressed the cuts together. Drops of blood rained into the open music box, and then Milla closed it. It was like some twisted blood oath, like they were becoming sisters. When they broke apart, Milla cupped Elphaba's face in her hands and pressed their foreheads together. She whispered something that I couldn't hear, and then she kissed her. Just a quick peck on the lips- like sisters do."

Then, Elphaba pushed the music box aside, and lay down next to Milla, laying her head in Milla's lap. The snow drifted around them, and Milla seemed to be saying something to Elphaba, either talking or singing to her, running her fingers through her hair, leaving blood. They sat in the middle of the sidewalk together, and then Elphaba started to shake.

"She was sobbing. And Milla was trying to calm her down. That much was clear. Both girls were bleeding and shaking, and suddenly Elphaba cries, 'I want Mama! It's not fair, Milla! It's not fair! I want my Mama.' Mrs. Thropp's death shook Elphaba hard."

The music box incident was never repeated, but Elphaba did continue to come out and sit on the curb at night. She also became a chain smoker during break; used to, she would smoke once or twice a day, but after winter break, Elphaba was always seen with a cigarette in her hand, sometimes, she and Milla would stand outside under the cherry tree and share one- and once, we caught the girls sitting with their feet in the canal, sharing cigarettes and chainsmoking.

When we all came back from winter break, we found that the girls had changed- though they still confirmed our images, they changed just the same. Milla had pierced her nose, now dressed in and now went by Millina, and Elphaba always wore her mother's old embers coat, and some of her old clothing- bustiers, skirts, tunic tops, heels, boots, and jewelry. It was creepy, but if it made her feel better, then we couldn't fault her. They stayed together, only parting for their separate classes, but coming back together for lunch. They stayed together the rest of the day until they returned to their dorm.

Once we were all back at school, we slowly began to approach the girls, and it was during lunch one afternoon when Fiyero gently tapped Elphaba's shoulder. Slowly, the two girls turned to look at him.

"They both had dark circles under their eyes, like they'd been staying up all night. Elphaba was wrapped in that coat of her mother's, and she had an unlit cigarette between her fingers. 'What do you want?' She whispered, fingering the cigarette. It was then that my mouth stopped working."

When he didn't say anything further, the girls returned to lunch, ignoring him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: what's going on?**

**Answer: I don't want to give too much away. So I'm gonna pose this question: what do you all think is going on?**

**Thanks to Hedwig466 for reviewing the seventh chapter.**

We didn't try to speak to the girls for several weeks. When we did again try to speak to the girls, it was the weekend of the spring dance, held in March. between coming back in mid-January and March, we left the girls alone, getting caught up in the swing of classes once again and returning to school time.

So it was that March afternoon, when Fiyero looked up from his book, as we all sat in the library, studying.

"I'm gonna ask Elphaba to the dance."

We all nodded, but figured he was bluffing. It was a well-known fact that Milla and Elphaba weren't allowed to date- their parents kept them both on tight leashes.

"Seriously, I'm going to ask Elphaba to the dance."

"Good luck with that. You'll have to get past her dad first, and we all know that that's never gonna happen." Boq said, flipping pages in his book. Once we'd battered and joked with him enough, he closed his book, stood, and left the library. After several moments, we all got up and followed.

Fiyero was making his way towards Elphaba and Milla, who were sitting on the edge of the canal, their feet in the water, sharing a cigarette. Elphaba was dressed in one of her mother's bustiers, a skirt, and that old jacket.

"Elphaba?"

Milla looked up, the cigarette between her lips. She nudged Elphaba, who's head snapped up. Her eyes widened to see him standing there, and quickly, she grabbed the cigarette from Milla and slipped it between her lips. When she removed it moments later, she asked,

"What do you want, Fiyero?" Her voice was soft, and the smoke escaped her lips like angels' wings taking flight. She tapped the cigarette, watching the ash fall into the canal, before turning to look up at Fiyero.

"I wanted to know if you wanted...." She waited, raising her eyebrows. "If you wanted to... to go to the spring dance at the Ozdust with me?"

She looked at Milla, before handing the cigarette back to Milla and climbing to her feet, pulling her feet out of the cold water. Then she helped Milla to her feet, and leaned down, grabbing her book bag.

"I can't. I'm sorry, Fiyero." She linked arms with Milla and the two turned to go, making their way across the green.

"It's not like I'm asking you to sleep with me! I'm just asking you to go to the dance with me!" He replied, following, and we politely followed behind. Finally, Elphaba spun on him.

"You don't get it, do you? I can't! I can't, Milla can't! Our parents _won't let us_! We've tried living our own lives! We've tried! But we can't! So we don't." Then, she turned on her heel and stalked off, but Milla stayed behind. She looked at each of us for a moment, before whispering.

"All Fabala and I want to do is be like you. We want our own lives. We want to live too. You don't know how lucky you are." Then, she turned and followed Elphaba.

The next night, we got ready for the dance, and met up at the Ozdust. All except for Fiyero. He showed up late, but with good reason: Elphaba and Milla were with him.

"I opened my dorm room door to find Elphaba and Milla in the doorway, waiting. They were both wearing dresses that had belonged to Mrs. Thropp- Milla in a midnight blue halter and Elphaba in an amythest spaghetti strap dress. Both looked very beautiful. When I asked what they were doing, Elphaba said, 'We just want a chance to live. Will you help us?' I couldn't refuse. When we headed down to the Ozdust, I took Elphaba's hand and noticed the scars on her fingers and palm. And then I turned to Milla- she'd done the same thing, exact same cuts."

Fiyero said they'd shared a look, like they knew they'd done wrong, but didn't say anything.

"Once we made it to the Ozdust, they both seemed to light up. It was like they'd never been to a dance before. They probably hadn't, come to think of it. As soon as we stepped through the doorway, they pulled away and hurried off to the bathroom."

Katila Tezq later told us that Elphaba and Milla spent twenty minutes in the bathroom.

"Elphaba was checking her makeup and Milla spread a couple layers of paper towels onto the sink counter before hopping up. Elphaba said the dresses belonged to her mother. I thought it was a little creepy, but then told her that they were pretty. I was in an Ozma Tip evening dress, and Milla whispered that it looked nice. They were talking and laughing; it was really annoying but I didn't say anything. I think this was their first dance, and they were both just really happy to be there, so I kept my mouth shut.

"Milla looked down at her lap, and whispered, 'I'm bleeding.' At first I thought she was talking about that she'd gotten her period for the month, but then I saw that her hands were bleeding. She had some strange looking scars on her palms and fingers. They'd cracked and were bleeding. Elphaba grabbed a bunch of paper towels and cleaned her hands, before wrapping them in dry towels. It was then that I noticed that Elphaba had the same kind of cuts on her hands and fingers. They looked like they were from a screwed up blood oath or something."

We've never been able to determine if the scars on the girls' hands were from a blood oath or not. Most people think that it was a twisted blood oath, and the way Boq described it, it seems like it was. We should have seen the signs: if the girls were able to harm themselves with a blood oath, then they were more than capable of committing suicide.


	9. Chapter 9

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: OTHER than the fact that her mom died, why is Elphaba so depressed? Or emmotional?**

**Answer: I don't want to give it all away. But I will say this.... it's partially due to her mother's death, and partially due to her father.....**

**Question: was it Morrible who told Frex the first time? What happens when he finds out about this?**

**Answer: yes to the first question. As for the second, you'll find out...**

**Thanks to ShortieJMW for reviewing the fifth, sixth, seventh and eighth chapter, to gagakid, Hedwig466, and Issa(dot)wicked17 for reviewing the eighth chapter, and to lizziemagic for reviewing the seventh and eighth chapter.**

The girls returned to the dance twenty minutes later, and joined us at the bar. Both wore looks of excitement on their faces, and they seemed to light up from within. After a moment of taking everything in, Elphaba went to Fiyero and perched on his lap, which startled him to say the least. Then, she reached out, and took a sip of his drink. Since the Ozdust was only a short walk away from the universery, cars weren't needed since everyone walked there.

"This is good. What is it?" She asked, licking her lips.

"Um... uh... it's a cocktail." We were all kind of startled. She looked at all of us.

"A cocktail?" Avaric nodded.

"Yeah, you've never had one before?" Elphaba shook her head.

"Milla and I aren't allowed to drink." She muttered, taking another sip. The Milla in question watched her friend with worry in her eyes. Her wrapped hands were again covered in blood, and quickly, Crope grabbed a napkin, dipped it in the cocktail he was drinking, and gently dabbed at the cuts on her hands. Once the bleeding had slowed, she looked up at him.

"Thank you." She whispered. He nodded. "Fabala, you-" Elphaba met her eyes, the thin lip of the glass between her pearl teeth. "Never mind." Elphaba nodded, slowly took another sip, and set the glass down, before hopping off Fiyero's lap and taking his hand.

"Come on, let's dance."

We all watched as she pulled Fiyero onto the dance floor. We'd come with our own dates, but it was a shock to see Elphaba dancing. After a while, Crope asked Milla to dance, and they joined the other couples on the dance floor. As a slow song began, everyone paired up, and began to sway back and forth gently. From our various vantage points on the dance floor, we all saw Elphaba lay her head on Fiyero's shoulder. She seemed to relax as they swayed back and forth.

"After a while, she pulled away and whispered, 'Thank you.' I didn't quite get what she was talking about. The alcohol was taking affect and it made her eyes shine in the light. 'For what?' She looked away, before turning back and saying, 'For helping Milla and I live.' I don't know what possessed me, but I leaned down and kissed her. It was quick, gentle. She tasted like alcohol, alcohol and peppermint. It's the most intoxicating taste I've ever sampled. And suddenly, I couldn't help myself. I took her hand and led her outside. We stood under the stars, just kissing and touching. We didn't go any farther than that, and for most guys they probably would have demanded more, but for me, for that night at least, it was enough."

Twenty minutes later, they returned to the dance, and joined us at the table we were sitting at. Milla at that point had loosened up more, and now sipped her own cocktail. Her hands had stopped bleeding, and she seemed to be having a good time. When she saw Elphaba, she hugged her close and kissed her.

"We need to do this again." She whispered, giggling. Clouds quickly covered Elphaba's eyes, but she blinked them away.

"What if someone tells our parents?" She said. Seeing as Elphaba only had one glass, the alcohol wasn't affecting her like it was Milla, who'd had three.

"They won't." Milla said.

"But what if they do, Mil? I don't want to leave Shiz."

Milla shrugged.

"Don't worry about it." She finished her glass, then grabbed Elphaba's hand. "Come on, Fabala." As they got up, she grabbed Crope's hand and tugged them onto the dance floor.

"For once in her young life, Milla was loosening up. She wasn't concerned about her parents finding out, about getting removed from Shiz, about anything but the music and the dancing. The dress she wore, Mrs. Thropp's blue halter, hugged her curves and fit like a second skin. I just remember running my hands over her body and feeling the silk of that dress under my hands. It was like she was wearing a nightgown made from the ocean- it was soft and smooth, and moved airily on her. I remember looking up and seeing Elphaba standing in the middle of the dance floor, arms around herself. It was like she'd switched personalities with Milla. Instead of being carefree, she was worrying about getting caught, so I grabbed her and spun her around to get her to relax. The skirt of the dress belled out around her, and after a moment, she laughed- cackled was more like it.

After a while, she left the dance floor, but by then, a slow song had come on, and Milla was snuggling into my arms, her head on my shoulder. 'I'm so glad I came. I've never had this much fun in my life.' She whispered, tilting her head to look up at me. Seconds went by, and then she rose on her toes and kissed me. When I broke the kiss, I looked up to see Elphaba and Fiyero gone."


	10. Chapter 10

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: Does each chapter switch speakers, in the same chapter? Like can both Avaric and Fiyero be narrating within the same one? Or is the one speaker for each chapter?**

**Answer: Each chapter does switch speakers. Yes, two of the boys can be narrating within the same chapter. **

**Thanks to lizziemagic, ShortieJMW, and Hedwig466 for reviewing the ninth chapter.**

The dance lasted long into the night, but for Elphaba and Fiyero, it had already ended.

"We walked back to Shiz together, and wandered through the woods surrounding the school. After a while, she stops and asks, 'Why me?' I thought a moment, and then said, 'I love you.' Her eyes widened, and she pulled away. She seemed scared. She acted like I'd hit her. Then tossed her head and said, 'You can't love me.' I just remember moving closer to her. 'And why can't I?' I asked. She blinked back tears. 'Because the only person that truly loves me is dead.'

It was then that I realized that she was talking about her mother. I just remember moving towards her, and taking her in my arms, and that was when she broke down. And suddenly it all made sense. Wearing her mother's clothes, acting like her, speaking like her, it was all so Elphaba wouldn't feel like Mrs. Thropp had abandoned her. All I could do was hold her close and calm her down. When she seemed to calm down, she pulled away and wiped her eyes.

'Thank you.' I just nodded, and took her hand. We left the woods, and continued through campus. I walked her to her dorm, and when I turned to go she tugged me back to her. 'Come with me. Please?' I don't know why I didn't say no, that I couldn't, that I wasn't going to be the cause of her being removed from school, but I didn't say anything. Nothing. I just... let her lead the way to her room."

At first, Fiyero didn't say anything about what happened that night- only that he'd comforted her in the woods. It wasn't until that interview years later, when Elphaba was nothing but a distant memory to those at Shiz, that Fiyero admitted to taking her that night.

"I didn't want to. Mainly, we just sat on her bed kissing. I remember when we first entered her dorm.... the room was absolute chaos. It was... two girls growing up the best they could under their parents watchful but distant eyes. Clothing was everywhere- I remember seeing a black braissere draped haphazardly over the desk light.... and a.... a stuffed raven laying on the floor next to Elphaba's bed. The whole room smelled like perfume- lilies and roses- and there were perfume bottles on the desk, and then it clicked that Elphaba smelled like roses. She caught me staring at the mess, and whispered, 'You don't mind, do you? Milla and I kind of like the mess.'"

Fiyero said that he didn't mind, and the remembered how she reached behind her and unzipped the back of the dress. As the straps fell, she grabbed him by the front of his shirt, and pulled him to her. They spent the majority of the time kissing, before she moved his hand to her breast.

"It was then that I pulled away. I couldn't do that too her, I loved her, but... there's a huge difference between loving someone and taking their virginity. I tried to tell Elphaba that we were making a mistake, but she wouldn't hear of it. 'Please Fiyero. Please. This is something _I _can control, something my dad has _no_ say in. Please. You said you'd help me live. Please, Fiyero, help me live.'"

And she kissed him, pulling him towards her. They tumbled back on the bed, undressing and touching, caring only about each other. Fiyero made love to her that night in the girls' dorm, and when they lay together after, she asked, "Did you take me to the dance because you think I'm a kook? Or did you feel sorry for me? For both me and Milla?"

"I don't feel sorry for you. I love you. You and Milla deserve to live normal lives, not to be trapped in some cage like animals. I love you. I don't feel sorry for you. I love you." He kissed her softly, and the two curled up under the covers, amid the mess and security that was the girls' lives.

As for Milla, her virginity lasted two hours longer than Elphaba's but in the end, it too was taken. Drunk and relaxed, Milla pulled Crope outside and proceeded to try to get him to undress her in the light of the moon.

"She was drunk, completely and absolultely drunk. She didn't know where Elphaba had disappeared to, and had no desire whatsoever to hunt for her. Instead, she spent most of her time with her lips glued to mine. Then, she grabbed my hands and tugged me back to Shiz, to her dorm, and into her room. Of course, as soon as she saw Elphaba and Fiyero, she burst into excited giggles. 'I guess we know where Fabala went!' She found it hilarious, and then when she went to wake them up, I grabbed her hand and pulled her back to the door, and took her to the dorm Fiyero and I shared."

According to Crope, she got even worse. As soon as she set foot in the boys' dorm, she shoved him against the bed and began to undress both of them.

"I wasn't going to take advantage of her- especially considering the state she was in. I even managed to get her out the door and halfway across campus before she bit me. She didn't want to wake Elphaba, and didn't want to stay in their dorm, and begged to stay in mine. In the end, I agreed, and she was so excited she pulled me back to the dorm, and locked the door. You can guess about what went on from there."

Afterwards, Crope lay awake with her in his arms, beating himself up over what he'd done. The next morning, he took her back to her dorm early, and dragged Fiyero back to theirs. If the boys had paid closer attention, they would have realized that they were being watched.


	11. Sex

_**Sex**_

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: being watched?**

**Answer: yep**

**Question: she dies now right?**

**Answer: now? maybe....**

**A/N: The first section was when Elphaba and Milla were both about nineteen, I started it at the beginning of their second year at Shiz, and the first section follows the whole year. So the girls are both twenty in this section. **

**Thanks to gagakid, Issa(dot)wicked17, ShortieJMW, lizziemagic, and Hedwig466 for reviewing 10.**

Most people assumed that the girls had been immediately removed from Shiz the day after the dance. In actuality, that was the furthest from the truth. The girls stayed at Shiz until the summer holidays, and when everyone left for break, the girls followed. From what we know, Boq said that he saw Elphaba and Nessarose leave Colwen Grounds with their father three days after Elphaba returned from Shiz.

"She was carrying a suitcase, and had a porcelian doll in her arms. As Mr. Thropp helped Nessarose into the car, Elphaba stood on the steps and watched the house. It was like she didn't want to leave. Then, he called to her, and she hurried to the car."

We managed to find out where Govenor Thropp took his daughters for the summer holidays- they went to see his mother in Gillikin. When we called old Mrs. Thropp years later and asked her about the summer that the girls spent with her, she only gave a sketchy account, as if afraid of betraying her son.

"Yes, Elphaba and Nessarose were here for the summer. They spent time wandering downtown, going to the shops and going on walks, although they never associated with boys, their father didn't want them too."

When we asked about how Govenor Thropp had reacted to Elphaba losing her virginity, Mrs. Thropp said she didn't know about that.

"That child didn't say anything about losing her cherry. She barely said two words the entire time she was here. Kept to herself mainly, spent a lot of time staring out the window or curled up on the sofa."

We could picture Elphaba, drained of life, her gaze on the window, or her slender form curled up on the sofa, as Nessa read, and her watched over them, old Mrs. Thropp silently bearing witness to her granddaughters wasting away.

We did manage to find out how Mr. Thropp had reacted when he discovered Elphaba's virginity gone- by way of Mrs. Wiks from next door, who had been outside tending her roses when the blow up happened. Finding her on her front porch, watching her prized roses wilt and die in the summer heat some twenty years after, Mrs. Wiks still referred to us as young ones, even though we were older now, with families and businesses to take care of.

"I look up and she comes flying out the front door. She hurried down the front steps, and tripped, losing her footing. Landed in the grass, near the maple her mother loved so much. I couldn't help but watch as she climbed to her feet and scrambled up that tree. The next thing I hear, is Mr. Thropp yelling and the front door slamming. He marched right over to that maple, reached up, and grabbed her ankle.

Poor kid fought like hell. He finally lets her go and yells, 'You were told to stay away from the boys!' She didn't say anything at first, and then after a moment, throws down a dead branch that had been hanging by its last thread to that tree, shouting at the top of her lungs, 'You can't tell me what to do! I'm not a child! I'm twenty-years-old! I can do what I want, when I want, and with _whoever I want_!' I was a little confused at first, and then I remembered that Elphaba's birthday had been that past September.

'You're my child! And as long as you live under my roof, you'll do as I say!' She just threw down another dead branch. 'I'm not a child anymore! And I don't live under your roof! I live at Shiz!' I was afraid he was going to explode, so I moved onto my porch. 'Not anymore!' And then he turned and went back into the house. Once he was gone, Elphaba climbed down from the tree, and hurried after him. But she stopped to look at me as she went. The last thing I heard was her screaming, 'You can't do that!' before the front door slammed. Of course, I turn to look down the street, and see that Qyte girl standing on her front porch, watching. She was wiping her face. I think her parents had reacted the same way."

Three days after the arguement, Elphaba was seen leaving the house with her father and sister. They stayed away the entire time, and only came back four days before the new fall semester started. By then, Glinda would be at Shiz, but whether her cousin and Elphaba would be back, was the big question everyone was hoping would be answered.

When we got back to school that first day, neither Elphaba nor Milla were there. It wasn't until two weeks in that the girls decided to make an appearance. When we talked to Madame Morrible about the girls' return, she only gave a brief account.

"Both Mr. Thropp and Mr. and Mrs. Qyte were adament about their daughters returning to school. The only reason Elphaba and Milla were allowed to return was because Milla's cousin Glinda was starting that semester, and Nessarose was going to be there a year later. They were only allowed to stay for the younger girls, and once the girls were settled, the two oldest were going to be removed."

When we brought up the subject of the girls' lost virginity, Morrible quickly put an end to the arguement.

"Those girls had had enough time at school, they didn't need anymore as far as their parents were concerned. I know Mr. Thropp wanted Elphaba to marry a duke or something, and as far as school, she'd had enough."

When we asked about the engagement ring that had been found on her body after her suicide was discovered, Morrible again shot it down.

"That girl didn't want to take her own life. She was excited about her engagement to Manek Zir, she didn't want to die. It was an accident, a horrible accident."


	12. Chapter 12

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: What? It was an accident?**

**Answer: not saying**

**Question: So she didn't kill herself? Or is Morrible just being Morrible...?**

**Answer: you'll have to find out**

**Thanks to Hedwig466 for reviewing the eleventh chapter. **

The first time any of us got a good look at Glinda Upland, we all agreed that she was pretty, but not as pretty as Milla and Elphaba. Petite, blonde, and blue-eyed, Glinda kept up on her appearance and cared about popularity, but stayed with the other girls most of the time. Those first few weeks after school started, found the girls sitting together at lunch, and Glinda often spent nights at the older girls' dorm, because she didn't want to stay alone.

Six weeks into the new semester, was when Elphaba recieved the letter. It was from a young man her father wanted her to marry, Manek Zir, who, it turns out, wasn't a duke at all, but a young count in the Emerald City. Elphaba, it turns out, wasn't happy. Pfanne Avq, who lived in the dorm next to Elphaba and Milla's, found the short letter on the floor of the girls' dorm weeks before their deaths. Ripped up, we managed to tape it back together.

_My Dearest Elphaba,_

_I hope to hear from you soon, my sweet. Hopefully, by this time next year, we'll be married, and you'll be settled in Whitethorn Manor comfortably. I eagerly await your arrival in the City, and can't wait to take you to the showing of Swan Lake. You do like ballet, don't you? __Everything has been confirmed, my love. I asked for your hand, and your father graciously agreed that you would accept my proposal. _

_You won't be disappointed, my love, I promise you that. Before you know it, you'll be the Countess of Whitethorn, a proud wife and mother. Your father is very pleased with the match, and I'm certain we will get along together wonderfully. I hope to hear from you soon, my darling, and I await your arrival in the City. Until then, I want you to content yourself with this diamond ring, a family heirloom, for our engagement. _

_I eagerly await your reply, my love._

_Manek_

Over the next two years, we saw the engagement ring on her hand, although she never said anything about who had given it to her or if she was marrying. Only Milla and Glinda seemed to know who the ring was from, but didn't say anything. When we talked to Manek years after Elphaba's death, he had married someone else, and didn't seem to accept the possible reasons behind Elphaba's death as fact.

"She didn't want to kill herself, she didn't want to die. She was happy about our engagment. I recieved several letters over the months from her, all saying that she couldn't wait to marry me and that we were going to be very happy together."

In fact, many people had agreed that Elphaba was happy about the engagement, but she herself said nothing. Days after noticing the ring, Boq stopped Glinda in the hall during class, and their conversation, as Boq remembers it, lasted sever minutes before Glinda hurried off to meet Milla and Elphaba.

"Is everything all right with Elphaba? She seems kind of depressed."

Glinda turned to look up at him.

"Elphie's fine. She's not depressed, she just worried about classes."

"Are you sure? She seems kind of on edge."

Glinda giggled nervously.

"She's not on edge. She's just having trouble with a couple of her classes. I told her to drop them, but as usual, she doesn't listen to anyone."

"Are you sure there isn't something else going on?"

"I'm sure. Elphie's one of my best friends. She'd tell me if something was bothering her."

"But what if something is?" He asked, grabbing her arm and stopping her before she could leave. Sighing, Glinda turned to meet his eyes.

"Nothing's bothering her. She's fine. Okay? And since when do you care about Elphie, or Milla or I?"

And then she left, leaving Boq in the middle of the hall. Of course, while she didn't say anything about her engagement to Manek, Elphaba continued to see Fiyero, even sneaking into his dorm in the middle of the night.

"I woke up one evening to someone laying in bed with me. I couldn't figure out who was with me, until she whisperd, 'Don't talk, just kiss me.' It was then that I realized that it was Elphaba. She'd climbed through my window, and woken me up. Thank god Crope was out for the night. After several minutes, I managed to push her away, and turn on a light, which she quickly turned off.

'Don't turn it on. Please. Just kiss me. Just make love to me.' She took control that night, never letting me get a word in edgewise. Afterwards, we're laying there in bed, and she takes my hand and laces our fingers together. 'Do you really love me, Fiyero?' I could only nod.

'Yes. With all my heart.'

Her eyes welled with tears, but she blinked them away and whispered, 'Then marry me.' I couldn't breathe. I thought she was kidding, and slowly, I pulled away. 'I'm serious, Fiyero. Marry me. Please.' I couldn't break her heart, but I couldn't marry her. And now I realize it was the biggest mistake of my life.'

Morrible caught Elphaba sneaking back into her dorm the next morning, and put all three girls on lockdown.


	13. Chapter 13

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

We didn't see the girls for several weeks after Elphaba was caught sneaking back into her dorm. But according to several of the others girls that lived in Crage Hall, the girls weren't allowed to leave the school, and only were allowed to attend class and then return to their dorms, Glinda included. When Glinda caught a couple classmates talking about the punishing the girls, she lost her temper.

"We didn't ask for this!"

"But it was Elphaba's fault you're all being punished."

"Elphie just wanted to live. That's all we want, is to live. But no one wants us to."

According to the other students, Glinda hurried out of the classroom, and returned to her dorm. As for Elphaba and Milla, they didn't come to class those first few days after the lockdown was put into place. Instead, they spent time reading and messing with makeup, cleaning and making a mess of their dorm to keep themselves occupied. When they did return to classes, they kept to themselves, staring off into space or working on class work.

We didn't try to talk to the girls again, until winter break rolled around, when we were all waiting for the train to once again come and take us all home. That afternoon, Elphaba, Glinda, and Milla were sitting in the cafe, sipping cocoa and talking silently. They ignored us, and it was only as we were boarding the train, that Elphaba said anything to us.

"They have to let us live. They can't do this to us."

We didn't say anything, just found a compartment and watched the scenery go by. When Boq, Glinda, Milla, and Elphaba got off at Munchkinland, the girls' parents were to take them home. That winter break was quiet, instead of the girls coming out to make snow angels or have snowball fights, they stayed inside, and once or twice, Boq said he saw a hand wipe the frost from the window before an eye peaked out.

No one found the holidays very festive, partially because the Thropps and Qytes weren't celebrating, at least not that we could tell. Whenever one of the girls did come outside, they stayed for a few minutes, before returning inside. We all got together at Boq's house two days after Lurlinemas, hanging out and discussing our query. It was that afternoon, two days after Lurlinemas, that the Parks Department came to cut the maple in front of the Thropp residence down.

Mr. Thropp had asked the department to remove the tree, seeing as it did nothing but remind him and his family of his deceased wife, and he didn't want the girls assuming that because Mrs. Thropp took her own life, that the girls could take theirs as well. Any reminder of Mrs. Thropp was removed from the house and placed in the trash- we managed to save some of the items, ranging from a simple scrapbook of photos to a pair of lace garters she'd worn- and the maple, as something Mrs. Thropp had once loved, had to go too.

So everyone came out to watch Mrs. Thropp's maple be removed- everyone except the girls. We stayed a safe distance from Colwen Grounds, watching as the Parks Department in their red suits and hard hats circled the tree, before raising their chainsaws.

It happened so quickly, everyone nearly missed it. Someone came out the front door of the Thropp house, and rushed to the tree, throwing herself on it as the chainsaws moaned in activity. It was only when she was safely agaisnt the trunk of the old maple, that the foreman called for the men to stop.

It was Elphaba, in a long nightgown and scarf, barefoot, her hair down around her face. Out of breath and in tears, she pressed herself against the trunk, watching the men as they circled her.

"All right, miss, you have to move. We have orders to cut this down."

She shook her head.

"You can't."

"I don't have a choice." The foreman replied.

"Who?"

"What?"

"Who ordered you to cut down my maple?"

He sighed, and motioned to Mr. Thropp, who'd come on the front porch, Nessa and Shell behind him. Her head snapped to the side, and she glared at her father, before turning back to the man.

"You can't cut it down! It was my mother's maple!" She cried, pressing herself closer to the tree.

"I don't have a choice."

"If it were sick or dying, that would be understandable! But just because you don't want us to remember Mama, is _not_ an excuse to cut down her maple tree!" Elphaba screamed, turning on her father.

"You don't know what you're doing, Elphaba, you're not thinking clearly." Mr. Thropp replied.

"You want to cut down Mama's maple?" Nessa cried, looking at her father.

"Not now, Nessa!"

Quickly, everyone watched as Nessa wheeled down to her sister.

"You can't cut down Mama's tree!"

Suddenly, Milla and Glinda rushed through the crowd, and joined the two sisters at the base of the maple.

"It did nothing to you! All it did was sit here, watching! Mrs. Thropp loved this tree, you can't get rid of it!" Milla cried, wheeling on the man she'd looked to as a second father for most of her short life. He moved towards the girls, until he stood only inches from them.

"You girls don't understand. The longer that tree stays here, the more likely it is for you to be tainted." Mr. Thropp replied. Elphaba shook her head.

"You hated Mama. You never loved her. You hated her and you abused her and you wanted to get rid of her! And you did! You killed her! You murdered her, you bastard!" Elphaba cried. Suddenly, we all watched as Mr. Thropp struck his oldest daughter hard. She cried out, and pulled away from the other girls, before scrambling up into the tree.

"Elphaba, you get down from there this instant!"

"No! I won't let you cut down Mama's tree! You can't!"

This is all speculation, taken from eyewitness accounts of the incident. One thing was certain, Elphaba refused to let them remove the maple Mrs. Thropp had loved so.

"It wasn't the tree that mattered, it was her mother. That girl loved her mother so much, she thought if she saved the tree, she could save her mother's memory from being wiped from oblivion." Mrs. Wiks remarked on the incident.

Everyone watched as the girls were escorted back into the houses by their parents, and Elphaba had to be forcably removed from the branches of the old maple by one of the workers, who promptly handed her to her father, kicking and screaming. He then dragged her into the house; we all watched as she was taken back into the house, her obsinites and screams echoing long after the door had closed behind her and the whir of the saws began again.


	14. Chapter 14

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: An arranged married?**

**Answer: yes**

**Question: EXCITED ABOUT MARRYING MANEK?!?!?**

**Answer: different people remember things differently**

**Thanks to ShortieJMW, lizziemagic, and Hedwig466 for reviewing the eleventh, twelfth and thirteenth chapters, and Wicked'elphaba-fiyero, and Issa(dot)wicked17for reviewing the thirteenth chapter. **

When everyone returned from winter break, they stayed clear of the girls; all had heard about the spectacle concerning the old maple, and most thought the girls had done it for attention. No one knew the real reason for the girls' outburst- Mrs. Thropp's death. In class, they treated Elphaba like a pariah, avoiding her at all costs, afraid they'd catch whatever she had.

The three spent their time sitting together in the green, or at a table in the back of the cafeteria. And it was one afternoon, as we were passing classes, that we saw the girls sitting under the cherry tree. A light rain storm had broken, drenching everyone in its wake, and the girls sat on the grass, getting soaked to the skin. At one point, we saw Elphaba lift a cup to her lips, and realized that the girls were sharing a cup of coffee, oblivious to the world around them.

We tried to talk to the girls, passing them notes and shooting them glances. They ignored us, focusing on their studies or each other. Most agreed that Elphaba had something that could easily spread: depression, sadness, and even though she wore fake smiles, she was only going further off the deep end. Everyone was waiting- not for the wedding bells that were in Elphaba's future, but for something else.

Her death.

Speculation began: if Elphaba went off the deep end, she'd take Glinda and Milla with her. Little did anyone know that the girls would do just that.

Until then, the girls kept to themselves, sitting together during lunch, or wandering around campus, arms linked. We tried our hardest to get the girls' attention, even going so far as to standing outside their dorm window and throwing pebbles. Only Fiyero seemed to have any luck. Ignoring the rumors swirling around Elphaba, he had silent conversations with her during class, and met her more than once in the bushes outside Crage Hall.

More than once, Elphaba snuck into Fiyero's dorm, spent a good hour or two with him, and always left with a kiss and a whispered, "If Horrible Morrible catches me, I'll never be allowed to leave the dorm." Then, Fiyero would watch her disappear into the mist. In that time after winter break, Milla and Glinda also developed secret trysts, with Crope and Boq- nowhere near the sexual relationship Elphaba and Fiyero had, but relationships all the same.

Yes, Milla's virginity had been taken, but she adamently denied it happening in the first place, and wouldn't let Crope get anywhere near her bed. As for Glinda, kissing wasn't allowed, just holding hands, and the young girl spent much of her time blushing and trying to hard. She wasn't experienced, like Elphaba, or confident like Milla.

"She was a child. In every sense of the word." Madame Morrible explained when we asked about Glinda. "What she was doing at Shiz, we'll never know. She certainly didn't belong here; none of those girls did. They belonged at home, with their parents. If they had stayed home, these accidents wouldn't have happened."

Once again, we brought up Mrs. Thropp's apparent suicide, and the role it played in her daughters' deaths, Morrible scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"That woman was emotionally and mentally unstable. Why she was allowed to have and raise children, we'll never know. Those children should have been taken from her the moment they were born. Her death was bound to happen, she was a lunatic."

We asked about Elphaba and the knapsack that had been with her when she died, and again, Morrible scoffed.

"That child was brilliant. Brilliant and confused. She didn't understand that her mother did her a service, by taking her own life. She herself was a ticking time bomb. Both those sisters were. With a mother like that, they were bound to be. I'm amazed she didn't shoot up the school."

The idea that Elphaba would have unleashed rampage was absurd, she was introverted, not extroverted. Kept to herself, and left everyone else alone. But the notion that she was mentally unstable, was an idea the whole school played with up to and after her death. Milla, Glinda, and Nessa were seen as copycats, although all four went at once. For years, a pact had been suspected, but no note or signed agreement was ever found. We've searched everything, examined all of our evidence, and found nothing that suggests a suicide pact.

One piece of evidence we have in our possession, is a note Milla had written to Tibbett in Life Sciences. Having slipped it to him during class one afternoon, he was surprised by its contents:

_Wouldn't happen to have a razor on you, would you? _

_I need to slit my wrists now, Nikidik is boring me to death._

The mere fact that Milla mentions suicide- even sarcastically- is startling, as is the choice of "suicide." Perhaps the note, although meant as a way to relieve boredom during class, prophesized what was to come, not just for Milla, but for the other girls as well. We've weighed this note against one Elphaba slipped into Fiyero's bag after Ozian Lit, and the similarities are startling. Although longer than Milla's the content is, for the most part, the same:

_Did Oxur intend to bore you to death? Was that what he had in mind when he wrote _The Geliva_? I've never been so bored in my entire life. _

_I was just about ready to hang myself with my own scarf. Worst book we've read so far. Can't wait until the semester's over. _

_Meet me in the bushes tonight? Eight p.m.?_


	15. Chapter 15

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**A/N: Sorry about the delay.... I've had two finals this week....**

**Thanks to ShortieJMW, lizziemagic and Hedwig466 for reviewing the fourteenth chapter.**

Classes continued as usual, sucking us into the mundane life of academia. The girls kept to themselves during class, heeding the threats of being removed from school. They avoided Morrible at all costs, and refused to acknowledge our existence. Rumors still swirled about the maple tree, and Elphaba receded even further into herself, except around Glinda and Milla. They spent weekends in their dorm, talking and giving each other makeovers, doing homework and cleaning the room, only to make a mess again.

The week before spring break, a dance was announced, and everyone in school began planning- from what they'd wear, to who they'd go with. Everyone assumed the girls wouldn't go, being the pariahs they were, but they surprised us all by showing up, with Crope and Fiyero. Glinda tagged along, never having been to a dance, and found the whole experience exciting. She stayed close to Milla and Elphaba, even when the two older girls slipped off to dance with their dates.

Halfway through the dance, Elphaba and Fiyero slipped out of the Ozdust, and went to The Wilted Rose. Milla and Glinda, dragging Crope and Boq behind, followed, and the six slipped into a booth in the back corner of the cafe. They sat and talked, sipping coffee and sharing cookies and scones, the magic of the evening sparking the air. At one point, Elphaba and Milla exchanged necklaces, preferring the others' to the one they were wearing.

"Oh my Oz. Is that- that can't be! Fabala, look!" Milla cried, reaching across the table and grabbing Elphaba's arm. She set the cup of coffee she was sipping down, and turned to what Milla was staring at.

"Is that- Candle?" Milla nodded. "She's not. She's not. There's _no way _she's with- oh my Oz. She's with Irji Hev. She can do _so_ much better than Irji. I'm actually ashamed to admit that I'm related to her." Elphaba said, turning from the sight of her cousin in Irji's lap, and proceeding to examin her cuticles.

"_Whore much_?" Milla asked, referencing the fact that Candle was practically giving Irji a lap dance as they sucked face. It seemed that the girls knew about everyone at Shiz, though they kept to themselves. People watched, was what Milla called it. And so they told us about the various professors with sick little fetishes, the students that were screwing around in the classrooms at night, those that stole and robbed and those that plagerized.

Squeezed into the booth, Elphaba perched on Fiyero's lap because of the tight fit, they talked and laughed, enjoying the time to just be college students. No parents. No teachers. No rules.

"What do you want for your birthday, Mil?" Elphaba asked halfway through the evening. Milla's head snapped up, and she shook her head at Elphaba.

"I don't want anything."

Elphaba rolled her eyes at her friend.

"Oh come on, Milla. You're turning twenty-one. What do you want?"

"I'm only seven months older than you, Fabala-"

"Yeah, I know, and I hate you for it." Quickly, Milla stuck her tongue out at Elphaba, in a childish attempt to win the arguement. Upon hearing that though, she was soon bombarded with "When are you turning twenty-one?", "What _do_ you want?", "You can't _not_ celebrate your birthday." among other statements and questions. After a while, Milla spoke up.

"All right! I get it! I just... don't think I need anything for my birthday. We never celebrated it before, so why celebrate now? It'd just be a waste of time."

"You've never had a birthday party?" Fiyero asked, shifting Elphaba slightly on his lap. Milla shook her head.

"None of us have." Elphaba replied softly. Sadness swam in her eyes.

"Well, we'll have to fix that," Fiyero told the girls. "because everyone deserves a party on their birthday."

The girls tried to protest, but we wouldn't hear of it. We were going to throw the girls a party if it killed us. They needed a party, having never had a cake, candles, or even presents- minus the ones they'd recieve from Mrs. Thropp every year. So worked up were we, that once we managed to calm the conversation down, Elphaba asked,

"What do you want to do when you graduate?" We all thought a moment, sending the table into silence. Crope was the first to speak.

"I'm going to start working at Glinda Merta in the City after graduation."

"I want to own my own beauty salon." Glinda whispered, playing with her blonde curls.

"I'm going to publish some of my writings." Boq said, taking a sip of his coffee.

"You're a writer?" Glinda cried, as Boq nodded. "Oh please let me read some of your work!"

"I have to take the throne, but I'd much perfer to abdicate, get married, and.... raise a family." Fiyero said, looking at her. Then, he pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. She nodded into it.

"What about you two?" Crope asked, looking at the girls.

"Yeah, what are you two planning on doing after graduation?" Boq questioned, setting his cup down. Glinda looked from her cousin to Elphaba and back. Milla ducked her head, her hair falling into her face.

"No, it's silly." She whispered, embarrassed.

"It can't be that bad." Fiyero replied.

She shared a glance with Elphaba, before whispering,

"We want to live."


	16. Chapter 16

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: how long before they're caught this time?**

**Answer: You'll have to read and find out...**

**Question: is this story based on The Virgin Suicides?**

**Answer: Now that I go back and read through it, yeah, it kind of is. I hadn't realized that. We just finished reading _The Virgin Suicides _for my Lit class, and I guess I loosely based this off of the novel... sorry about that. I hadn't realized I was basing it off something.**

**Thanks to Hedwig466, lizziemagic, ShortieJMW for reviewing the fifteenth chapter, and to RealityInMyDreams for reviewing the first chapter.**

That night, as we all walked home, Fiyero took Elphaba on ahead. Deep in conversation, they held hands and wandered through campus. We bid goodnight to the girls when we got to Crage Hall, and left, going back to Briscoe.

"We talked about kids. What they'd look like if we got married. Blue eyed and raven-haired. With... green skin. I told her I couldn't wait to wake up every morning, to feel her by my side, to make love to her. I wanted to.... see her walk down the aisle in a white dress, feel our child kick within her womb... teach them to... dance or play ball. I wanted a life, a family with her. I didn't know she'd take her own life. But.... I guess Elphaba knew it all along, that she wouldn't have any of that. She knew, yet she played along."

The girls didn't acknowledge us the next day, or the next, or even after we all returned from spring break. However, when Fiyero caught sight of four gashes on her shoulder, red and swollen, looking like something from the _Nightmare on Elm Street _franchise. When asked, Elphaba said she stumbled back against a broken window and cut her shoulder, but everyone knew the truth: Mr. Thropp had most likely lost his temper, and taken it out on her.

She denied this, saying that her father couldn't possibly hurt her, that he loved her, but everyone saw through the rogue. And it was one afternoon, during Ozian Lit, that Elphaba's shoulder began to bleed. Stretching her arms over her head, she ripped the newly forming scabs, unleashing a slowly torrent of blood that began to stain her back, and the ties of her black halter. Elphaba, of course, was unaware of this, and it wasn't until she pulled her hair over her shoulder, and ran her hand down the column of onyx, only noticing the ruby red on her palm and fingers when she removed her hand.

Silent, she turned back to class, as though she hadn't just discovered that she was bleeding from the shoulder. Fiyero noticed, and asked Dr. Dillamond if he could take her to the infirmary, which he agreed. Silent, they left the class.

When we talked to Ms. Krueger years after, she seemed reluctant to say anything about Elphaba. After a while, we coaxed her into talking, and, turning to her files, she pulled out Elphaba's.

"Beautiful girl. It was a shame to see her meet that end. But that gash on her shoulder. She hadn't fallen, she'd been cut- like someone had slashed her with four steak knives all at once. Kind of _Nightmare on Elm Street_, if you know what I mean. Anyway, I stitched her up, and sent her back to her dorm with an antibiotic. Told her to take it easy for a couple days, let the stitches hold. Wanted to see her in three days. They seemed to be healing. As for that girl killing herself, she didn't seem like the type. Sure, she missed her mother, but she wasn't going to follow in her footsteps."

Maybe so, but the fact that the girls _had_ followed in Mrs. Thropp's footsteps, _had_ committed suicide, was a fact no one could ignore. We kept a close eye on the girls, talking with them softly, or walking with them to class, even though we knew they could all be removed at any time. Something was going on in the Thropp house, whether it was abuse or self-mutilation, we couldn't be sure, but _something_ was happening.

The most popular theory, was that Mr. Thropp was abusing the girls, as punishment for Mrs. Thropp's suicide, and the fiasco with the maple. Though none of them said anything- not even Nessa, who was at Shiz the year of her death- would say a word about what happened at home. Everyone was left to wonder if the girls were really being abused, or if they were mutilating themselves in some twisted oath.

Elphaba often talked about how excited Nessa was, to be coming to Shiz, and she was usually seen talking to Glinda about her baby sister, with Milla standing nearby. ShenShen happened to catch part of their conversation one spring day.

"Nessa's going to start attending Shiz next fall."

"I know."

"She's really excited about it."

"She's.... seventeen?"

"Eighteen."

"Does she know what she's going to major in yet?"

"Yeah. Psychology and abuse."

"Why?"

"Because. She finds it interesting."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with your mom, would it?"

"Of course not..... look, Glinda, when Nessie starts school, would you.... room with her? Just for the first year. You'll both be in the same dorm, so I.... I just figured it'd be better if she roomed with someone she knew the first year instead of a total stranger."

"Sure. That's fine, Elphaba. Of course I'll room with her."

"Thank you."

Elphaba seemed visably relieved that Glinda had agreed to room with Nessa, and the girls did seem to get along. But by the time the summer holidays rolled around, the girls had become even more withdrawn, saying barely a word to anyone, and clamming up at any mention of home. We watched them leave the train in Munchkinland, knowing, that we would see them that coming fall, yet not knowing that this would be their last summer.


	17. Death

_**Death**_

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: So they never came back?**

**Answer: they never have another summer after this**

**Question: So did anyone find out about the dance? Or was this just general beating? Or something else entirely...**

**Answer: you'll find out**

**Thanks to ShortieJMW, lizziemagic, and Hedwig466 for reviewing the sixteenth chapter.**

The following fall, the girls returned to school, as usual, staying together and keeping as far from us as possible. And this time, we noticed a young girl in a wheelchair- Elphaba's sister, Nessarose. A pretty thing with chestnut hair and hazel eyes, she lacked the grace and beauty of her sister, but held the same mystery Elphaba did. That first afternoon, everyone gathered together in small groups, and watched as the four entered the auditorium where the Welcome assembly was being held. The girls moved to the front row, sitting at the end, Glinda in her short skirt and white tights, Milla in her jeans and cardigans, Nessa in her summer dresses with the slit sides, and Elphaba in her mother's clothes.

They huddled together, not paying attention as Morrible droned on about winter classes, passing notes and whispering softly. We watched as they passed notes and played Cat's Cradle with a string Glinda had pulled from her pocket. While everyone else paid attention to Morrible, the girls were off in their own little world, playing hand games and sharing secrets. When the assembly finally ended, the girls were the first to hurry out of the auditorium, as everyone watched.

The next few days of classes, found the girls wandering from classroom to classroom, sitting together during lunch, always together, and never alone. When we tried to talk to them, they snubbed us, pretending that we weren't there. From what we were able to gather, Mr. Thropp had found out from someone- Morrible most likely- about the girls attending the dance, and that was what prompted the gash on Elphaba's shoulder a semester before.

We could tell her father was abusing her, the black eye she hid with makeup; the way she walked, as though afraid to do too much activity and therefore risk more injury to her back; the cuts on her arms; the way she breathed, as though taking deep breaths would cause her to puncture a lung, like she'd broken a rib. Milla also exhibited signs of abuse: a limp, as if from a broken ankle that healed wrong; a bruise on her neck; a bandage on her shoulder. The younger girls weren't touched, they were left pristine and pure, while the older girls took the punishment.

What really proved that the older girls were being abused, were the welts on Elphaba's back. Fiyero noticed them one evening when Elphaba sneaked into his dorm. As they began undressing, he ran his hands down her back, causing her to shudder and pull away. When Fiyero asked what was wrong, she dodged the question. After several moments of bickering, Fiyero was able to examine her back, revealing several rows of angry, bleeding red welts.

"They looked like they were from a belt- or a whip. Some of them were healing, and others were fresh, like she'd just been beaten yesterday. I asked who was hurting her, but she ignored the question, and kissed me instead. The next afternoon, I cornered Nessa during lunch."

At first, the younger girl was reluctant to say anything and betray her sister, but after much coaxing, she finally gave up the secret that had obviously been eating her up inside.

"Dad's been beating her. She can't seem to do anything right in his eyes anymore."

"Beating her with what?"

Nessa bit her lip, before whispering,

"A horsewhip."

Afterwards, Nessa never mentioned it, never said anything to Fiyero about it, and was reluctant to leave her sister alone. But as the semester progressed, she began to become more involved in school, even making a few friends. However, she still stayed close to her sister, Milla, and Glinda. The four were often seen under the cherry tree, eating lunch, or watching and chatting as the older girls chain-smoked, their feet dangling in the cool water.

ShenShen remembers one paticular incident that took place in the bathroom.

"I came into the bathroom during lunch. The other three had brought chairs in, but only Glinda was sitting in one. Nessa was in her wheelchair, and Elphaba and Milla were sitting on the counter. Elphaba was smoking, and Milla pulled out a lighter, and lit the cigarette between her lips. They didn't say anything, just sat swinging their legs and watching the younger girls. A few minutes passed before Glinda spoke up.

"What if Morrible catches you smoking?"

Elphaba shrugged.

"Let her catch us. I don't care. I can't wait to get out of this fucking school anyway."

"But if you get thrown out, you'll have to go back home." Nessa said. "And if you do, Dad'll-"

"I'll run away. Run off to the city, or the Vinkus." Elphaba interjected. Then, she got this dreamy look on her face. "Yeah, I'll run off to the Vinkus. With Yero."

Nessa turned to look at Glinda.

"Who's Yero?"

"Elphaba's boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend." Elphaba replied.

"No, he's just someone you fuck whenever you get the chance." Milla answered.

"Elphaba! You're not a virgin?" She shook her head. "Dad doesn't know, does he?"

She didn't say anything for several minutes. Then,

"How do you think I ended up with the knife wounds on my stomach?"

"Oh Fabala! That was-" She nodded.

"Who cares. The point is, we need to get out." Milla interrupted.

"Get out?" Glinda asked. Milla nodded. "What do you mean 'get out?'"

Milla and Elphaba shared a quick glance.

"We need run away."


	18. Chapter 18

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

It is assumed, that at this point, the girls were planning to run.

They were seen looking through travel guides and atlases in the school library, had brochures shipped to their dorms, and were seen wandering through downtown, stopping at various clothing stores and looking through the racks for summer clothes. They sat together at lunch and whispered softly, talking about various locations and even mentioned renting a car.

Elphaba even returned to sneaking into Fiyero's room in the middle of the night.

"This one evening, after doing it, we're laying in bed, and she sits up on her elbow and asks, 'Have you ever thought of running away?'

It caught me off guard, so I shrugged and sat up. 'Sometimes. Why?' She just shrugged, and reached over to cup my cheek.

'Sometimes I just want to drop everything and flee. Just... run off, disappear, to someplace where no one will find me.' Then, she leaned over and kissed me. 'Run away with me, Yero.' I thought I'd dreamed it at first, but when she repeated it, I pulled away met her eyes.

'You can't be serious.' I replied. She nodded.

'I am. I want to runaway. And I want you to come with me.'

It took me a moment, but I finally climbed out of bed, and pulled on a robe. 'You've got to be insane. We can't runaway! What about school? What about Milla, and Glinda, and Nessa?'

'They'll come with us!' She cried, sitting up. 'Please Yero!'

I couldn't think straight, instead, I just shook my head. 'No. I can't, Elphaba. I'm sorry.' Tears gathered in her eyes, and she nodded, climbing out of bed. Then, she quickly got dressed, and kissed me.

'Okay. Goodbye Yero.' I watched her leave the dorm, and... if I'd known then..... sometimes I can't help feeling as though I'm responsible, that I was the one that caused her death."

Over the next few weeks, the girls were seen working on something, but whenever anyone got close enough, they'd hide it. Elphaba's birthday had come and gone in September, making her twenty-one, and Nessa's birthday was in January of the next year. The girls were focused on classes, ignoring the looks everyone gave them, focusing only on their plans. We spent time having silent conversations with the girls during class, caught up with them in the cafeteria, and wandered around downtown with them on weekends.

This was the point when the pact was said to have reared its ugly head.

For years after, it was assumed that the girls had made a blood pact, swearing suicide, whey n the option of running away was taken from them. At this point, the younger girls had settled in, and both Mr. Thropp and Mr. and Mrs. Qyte were planning on pulling the older girls from school. At this point, Shell had written Elphaba another letter, which we managed to save. While it doesn't give any insight into the girls, it does give insight into Mr. Thropp's state of mind at this point.

_Elba,_

_Dad's sending me to the Sir Chuffery School for Boys in Shiz. He says I need to 'get out of the house and away from you', but the funy thing is, you're not here. You're at Shiz. So he's going to be sending me to you. He keeps saying you need to be taken out of school, because you do nothing but cause trouble, and you'll hurt yourself, but you wouldn't do that, would you, Eba? Of course not._

_I'll be closer to you. Could I come visit sometime, Eba? Would that be okay? I hope so._

_I love you, Elba._

_Love,_

_Shell_

It is perhaps this letter that prompted Elphaba to change their plans. Instead of running away by themselves, they began asking us if we wanted to go with them. When asked, Elphaba wanted to take Shell with them.

"I want to get Shell as far from him as possible."

Katila had heard her say this in the cafeteria one afternoon, not long after she recieved the letter.

"I think she wanted to take her younger brother and run. It seemed like she had it all planned out."

The girls ran into us in the Wilted Rose cafe two days after Elphaba had recieved the letter. Sitting in the back booth of the cafe, they told us what they were planning and why. We all agreed, except for Fiyero.

"Our conversation from that night came flashing back into my mind. Only this time, instead of just talking about it, Elphaba was planning on it. I wanted to go, I really did. And maybe I should have. Who knows, if I had, she- and the other girls- would probably still be alive."

When we parted ways with the girls, they returned to their dorm, and we didn't see them for the rest of the day. Although Fiyero did see Elphaba that night.

"She slipped into my dorm that night. We didn't say anything at first, just made love like usual, but when we lay there afterwards, she said, 'We're going to run away. Milla, Nessa, Glinda, and I. And we're going to take Shell with us. We're going to get him away from my Dad, and go off somewhere. Maybe the City. Or maybe the Vinkus.' I just listened as she explained what they were planning. Finally, I asked,

'Why are you telling me this?' She lifted her head and stared at me for several minutes.

'Because I want you to help us. Please Yero.' I didn't say anything, but finally nodded.

'Okay.' She was so excited. If I'd known that night what she was planning, I would never had agreed."


	19. Passion

_**Passion**_

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

The girls continued their plans for their escape over the next few days. Milla, Glinda, and Nessa also asked the rest of us to help, and we planned when to show up and what signal they would give us. After much debating and arguing, the girls told us to come over around eight on May tenth. We'd pick Shell up at Sir Chuffery's School, and flee into the night. Excited to be helping the girls escape, we spent the next few days discussing in hushed tones during lunch or after class, where we'd go once we were out of Shiz. Crope suggested The City, where the girls could experience the hoi ploi of the captial of Oz. Avaric and Tibbett agreed on Gillikin, but Fiyero's idea of running off to the Vinkus won us over.

Finally, we packed and gathered in Crope and Fiyero's dorm, waiting for eight o'clock on the night of May tenth. We watched, seeing silhouettes of the girls running around the room, throwing things on the floor or taking things out of the closet. At one point, we saw who must have been Elphaba, talking on the phone to someone. She seemed to be arguing with them, before slamming the phone down and returning to packing.

An hour before eight, everything went silent, and we slipped out of the dorm, heading towards Crage. Slipping inside, we went to Milla and Elphaba's dorm, and knocked. Several moments passed before it opened, revealing Elphaba on the other side. She relaxed, smiling at us.

"Hey. You made it. We were starting to get worried, thought you'd chickened out on us."

Fiyero shook his head.

"We wouldn't do that to you."

She nodded, and quickly looked around, hearing something we couldn't. Then, she grabbed the front of Fiyero's shirt and pulled him inside.

"Inside, quickly." We entered the dorm, and Elphaba shut the door behind us. Once we were inside, she returned to her desk, sitting in the chair and pulling her knees to her chest. Her long raven hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail, and she was dressed in a pair of jeans and a red tank top. A pair of black ballet flats were on her feet, and she shuffled them against the wood of the chair. "Have a seat."

Slowly, we sat on the beds, watching her. After a while, Tibbett asked,

"Where are the other girls?"

Her head snapped up.

"Th... they'll be here. Glinda and Nessa are still packing. And Milla..." She trailed off, biting her lip, and glanced towards the bathroom. It was then, in the silence, that we heard the shower running.

"She's taking a shower? Now?" Crope asked. Elphaba turned back to look at him.

"She's not feeling well. I thought maybe it'd perk her up a bit." He nodded, accepting the explanation. Finally, she turned towards Fiyero. "Shell's going to meet us here. Milla's and my bags are over there; Glinda and Nessa will bring theirs when we join you. Would you take them down to the car?" She meant Avaric's car, since it was big enough for all of us, and Shell too.

"Sure." Avaric replied. Slowly, we got up, and went to the bags.

"I'll get Milla while you're doing that. Make sure she's okay. I think she's got a head cold; I told her not to worry about it, that we'd go another time, but she wouldn't hear of it. You know Mil. Stubborn as hell." Elphaba said, climbing off her chair and coming to us. She grabbed Fiyero's arm, stopping him. "Yero?" He turned to her. Slowly, she captured his lips in a deep, passionate kiss. When she finally pulled away, she whispered, "Thank you. I love you." Then, she grabbed a tan knapsack off the floor at the foot of Milla's bed and slung it over her shoulder. He nodded, whispered, 'I love you', and we left.

As we left Crage, heading across campus to Avaric's car, the sight of someone on the footbridge over the canal caused us pause. They leaned against the hand rail, staring into the water. Assuming it was someone out stargazing, we continued on, but, if we had looked back, really looked, we would have seen that it was Nessa.

Once we made it to the car, we placed the bags in the trunk, and then sat in the darkness, letting the evening breeze caress our faces, as we began to dream of our lives with the girls. We'd go to the Vinkus, live free from parental rules and smothering adults. The girls would blossom; maybe we'd marry, start families. So lost in our fantasies were we, that we didn't notice that an hour had gone by, and the girls hadn't shown.

Thinking they had more stuff than Elphaba had told us, we headed back to campus. It was then that we caught sight of someone running from Crage Hall. Quickly, Fiyero rushed to the person, stopping him. When we got closer, we realized it was Elphaba's baby brother, Shell. Shaking and sobbing, white as a sheet, he couldn't form a complete sentence without breaking into sobs.

"Shell! What's wrong?" Fiyero demanded, shaking the boy roughly. After several tear-filled gasps, he pointed to Crage Hall and cried,

"M... My sister! It.... it's Elba! She..... she...."

Not waiting for him to finish, Fiyero rushed off to Crage Hall; we could do nothing but follow. When we finally burst into the dorm and did a quick search, we saw what would send Shell into a mental hospital four days later, after his own attempt.

Elphaba.

Hanging from a rod in her closet, a noose around her neck. Her knapsack was still over her shoulder, and the toes of her ballet flats gently tapped against the stool she had kicked out from under her.

Slowly, Crope pulled his eyes away, and turned towards the bathroom. Taking tentative steps, he moved until he was at the door, and then gently, pushed it open. Inside, it looked like a regular bathroom, nothing out of the ordinary... until you got to the bathtub.

Elphaba had been right, Milla was still in the bathroom, however, not taking a shower, as she'd said. While yes, the shower was running, it was nothing more than a cover up- a shade- for Milla's gruesome choice of death. The water surrounding her had turned a light pink, due to the blood oozing from her wrists. Her beautiful eyes were open and glassy, as she leaned against one side of the tub, staring at us, one arm draped over the side, as though reaching out to us for help.

As we fled the dorm, and the hall, we realized that the girls had only asked for our help so they could escape in their own way. As we rushed back to Briscoe, we saw the wheelchair- Nessa's wheelchair- by the bridge. She'd climbed out of it, although her legs were weak, and gone to the railing. We'd seen her just before she slipped over the rail and threw herself into the water. The only one we didn't know about, was Glinda, but that mystery was soon solved. Glinda had made her way to Crage, while we were packing the bags in the trunk, and slipped into the dorm. She had been laying on the floor between the beds, a bullet in her mouth, but we'd been too horrified to stop and look.

From our understanding, Milla had gone first, turning on the shower and climbing into the tub, before slitting her wrists. Dead by the time we arrived, Elphaba had covered for her, talking about a shower, with the knowledge that her best friend was already a corpse in the bathroom they shared. Nessa had followed, going out to the canal and slipping over the bridge, falling into the water, while we were loading the car. By that time, Glinda had slipped into the dorm, helped Elphaba tie the noose around the rod, and then, moved between the two beds, watching as Elphaba closed the window that had been open. Then, silencer on, she slipped the barrel into her mouth, and pulled the trigger as Elphaba watched.

Elphaba died last.

Once Glinda was gone, she'd probably slipped into the closet, climbed onto the stool, slipped the noose around her neck, and kicked the stool from underneath her. The rope cutting off her air supply, she'd clawed herself, in a feeble attempt for air, as was evident by the blood on her skin near the noose.

The girls had done what they'd said, run away, but not with the help of cars or cash or the open road. No, they'd run away the only way they knew how, using us the only way they knew how- as decoys, as pawns in their game of Russian roulette. But we wouldn't know that until the following day, when the ambulence showed up, and the paramedics carted the bodies away as the whole school watched.


	20. Chapter 20

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**Question: Why didn't Yero run?**

**Answer:.... um..... he was helping Elphaba, like she asked....**

**Question: WHYYYYYYYYY?**

**Answer: maybe it was a combination of things.....**

**Thanks to lizziemagic and ShortieJMW for reviewing 18 and 19, and to Hedwig466 for reviewing 19.**

The next morning, the whole school gathered outside Crage Hall to see the paramedics leaving the building. Nessa had already been removed from the canal, and now resided in one of the ambulances. Everyone watched, silent, as the paramedics brought out one of the other girls. One of the men tripped, jolting the stretcher, and a hand fell from the stretcher- long, slender green fingers, with a small, silver engagement ring.

Elphaba.

Four more paramedics followed, a stretcher between each pair. They were solemn, lost in their own thoughts as to why four bright, beautiful young girls would take their own lives. Once they were gone, the police came and searched the dorm, collecting evidence, took witness statements. We told them all we knew about that night, about our conversation with Elphaba, about seeing Nessa, but not knowing at the time, about finding the other girls.

Over the next few days, they cleared the scene, and had the coroner examine the girls. He discovered the bullet lodged in Glinda's brain, examined the slashed arteries of Milla's wrists (both were completely severed), measured the amount of water in Nessa's young lungs, and noted the crushed half of Elphaba's esophagus. In the prime of life, he couldn't understand (as we couldn't) why four girls with so much to offer the world had decided to take their own lives.

When the coroner's report finally came out on the girls, he listed each of them as suicide, brought on by post-partum depression. And while that may have been true for Elphaba, it didn't seem true for the other girls. Milla, perhaps, because she had been just as close to Mrs. Thropp as Elphaba, but as for Glinda and Nessa, it didn't seem logical. The only logical explanation, seemed to be a suicide pact.

A week after the suicides, the girls' things were placed in the trash, to which we managed to save, and add too our private collection. Among the belongings, was a journal that had belonged to Milla, detailing her and Elphaba's two years before and up to the deaths. One entry that particularly stands out is dated May twentieth, the day of the dance and the night the girls lost their virginity.

_May 20th_

_Fiyero asked Fabala to the dance. She really wants to go, and I have to admit, so do I. The problem is, if we go, we could very well get caught. Fabala's sitting on her bed, smoking the cigarette she just took from my mouth, watching me. I want to go, I really do. But can we? If our parents find out, we'll be cooked. _

The entry is short, not mentioning anything other than a desire to go. As we read through the journal, we got an insight into their daily lives, but no closer to understanding why they did what they did. And it wasn't just the journal we saved, but also Elphaba's knapsack- the same knapsack she'd slung over her shoulder the night she died. In the knapsack, was a book, a pack of cigarettes, a lighter, a small black book, and a letter.

Inside the black book, is a list of dates, numbers, names, and places. They don't make sense, and we've found no evidence to show they meant anything. The only entry that seems to make sense, is dated April ninth, and beneath, is written,

_Mama Colwen Grounds April 2nd Dad Beat 30 _

The only thing that gives a clue, is the fact that in the coroner's report for Mrs. Thropp (the same coroner who later did the autopsy and report on Elphaba), he stated finding thirty cyanide pills in her stomach- twenty-two of which were partially digested. Going back over the evidence, we've found that one vial can hold thirty cyanide pills- Mrs. Thropp had taken the whole vial.

It seems Elphaba believed that her mother committed suicide, and wanted to follow in her footsteps- or at least thought about following. It also seems that Elphaba had some idea that her father was beating her mother. She starts to put the pieces together, finally leading to this conclusion:

At Colwen Grounds, on April second, Dad beat Mom, and she took thirty cyanide pills.

When we posed the question of Elphaba knowing that her mother was being beaten, Mr. Thropp vehemently denied it.

"I didn't beat Melena. I didn't beat Elphaba. Or Nessarose. I didn't lay a hand on any of them. I loved them! Melena was my wife, and Elphaba and Nessarose were my daughters! I wouldn't hurt them, I couldn't. I'm not that kind of man! Melena was depressed, she envisioned things that weren't true, and fed them to Elphaba like candy. She didn't mean to take her own life, and neither did the girls, it was an accident, they all were."

And upon mention of the bruises found on Mrs. Thropp's back, he grew angry.

"I didn't hit her! Melena fell the night before, and hurt her back pretty badly. I tried to get her to go to the doctor, but she wouldn't listen, insisting that she was all right. I didn't lay a hand on her!"

Apparently, Elphaba seemed to think otherwise.

We asked Elphaba's old Nanny- years later, at age eighty-nine- what things were like in the Thropp household, and she admitted to the abuse that Melena had suffered.

"Of course Melena was beaten. Frex beat her and both of those girls. He ruled that house with an iron fist, he destroyed those girls. Elphaba saw the abuse her mother went through, she endured it herself from the time she was a child. He killed Melena, and he killed those girls. All four of them."


	21. Fear

_**Fear**_

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**A/N: One more chapter....**

**Thanks to Hedwig466, lizziemagic, and ShortieJMW for reviewing the twentieth chapter.**

Over the next few weeks and months, it became taboo to mention the girls. No one spoke their names, no one slept in the dorm Nessa and Glinda had shared, and for a while, no one slept in the dorm room Elphaba and Milla had lived in. Both dorms were left intact, after the suicides, as though in a museum. Eventually, the dorm Nessa and Glinda lived in, was was torn down.

Everyone said that the reason the dorm was being torn down was because no one wanted to use it due to its association with death, which was partially true, but it was also being torn down because the floors were literally crumbling under your feet. As for the dorm room where Elphaba and Milla had died, it stayed vacant for weeks, students refusing to live in a room tainted with death. Eventually, students would move in, but they would always move out quickly, claiming to hear voices and sounds, or finding objects missing, or hearing the shower going at midnight, and when they checked, it was off.

Everyone wondered what had caused four bright, beautiful, limitless girls to commit suicide. We've tried for years to put the pieces together. We tried to figure out their lives for two years, and then their deaths, after. The girls intrigued us, mystified us, and we worked for another year to try to understand the girls and who they'd been, before we graduated from Shiz.

It was two days before graduation, that we slipped into the dorm, bringing candles, snacks, pillows, pads and pens, in an attempt to converse with the girls that had eluded us until the end. Nothing happened, until around midnight. About that time, we wandered around the apartment, listening. Around twelve forty-five, Crope heard the shower go on, and when he checked, he discovered it was off. But on closer inspection, he found that the tub was tinted pink, and there were red dots on the floor near the outside of the tub- as though someone had slit their wrists in the bath, and the blood had dropped from the wounds to the floor, beading the floor in rubies.

"It sounded like the shower was running, and reminded me of the night the girls died. I thought for a moment that Elphaba was going to ask us to take the bags down to the car. When I checked, I noticed that the shower was off, but then I noticed that there was some sort of ring around the tub. A light pink ring around the tub- like the ring water leaves when it drains. I didn't think much of it, but when I turned to leave the bathroom, something on the floor caught my eye.

There were four, distinct, small, ruby red beads on the floor near the tub. At first, I thought they were actual beads or drops of paint, but they weren't. They were blood. Without even thinking, I grabbed a towel, got it wet, and rubbed wiped them away- but they came back right before my eyes not five minutes later. Everytime I wiped them away, they came back, stronger and darker than before. It was like Milla was in the bathtub, with her wrist hanging over the side, her blood dripping.

And then I heard the shower start, but it hadn't. It was off. When I wiped the spots off again, I set the cloth on the sink, and turned to go back into the room, when I heard the shower start, and then I heard the sound of someone getting into the tub, followed by the blood appearing not twenty minutes after. It was like she was climbing back into the tub, like she was reliving her death."

The other encounter happened to Fiyero, when he checked the closet. Recieving nothing from being in the room, he slipped into the closet, and caught sight of the outline of a figure hanging from the rod in the closet. A creaking could be heard, it sounded like a body swaying back and forth, and Fiyero saw the outlined figure swaying. It was an outline of a woman. A woman Fiyero knew instantly. Elphaba. Safe to say, it shook him up. Both Fiyero and Crope.

It wasn't until years later, when he was handling cases in the City, that he told us about the voice in the closet.

"I didn't want to stay in the room anymmore, so I decided to try the closet, to see if I could hear anything. It was creepy just being in the closet where she died. At first, I didn't hear anything, I just felt a cold chill all around me, like I'd stepped into a freezer. But after a while, I began to hear something; like something being kicked away- a chair or a stool or a box. I waited, and then.... after a few more minutes, it was like a creaking, like a body swinging back and forth on a rope, and then a tapping, like shoes- kind of like someone had hung themselves in the closet. And then I heard a voice.

_"Fiyero.... I had to... I had to..."_

And then I felt someone touch my shoulder. Just briefly, but still... soft, gentle, like Elphaba used to. And then I heard her voice. It was soft, pleading almost. Like she was begging me to understand."

We tried, we did, to understand. But in the end, we didn't understand, no matter how hard we tried. They were so majestic, so mysterious, so unattainable, that even in death, they evaded us, as though taunting us, like they had in life.


	22. Obsession

**_Obsession_**

**Rifiuto: Non Miriena**

**A/N: Sorry it's shorter than the other chapters... the end has Jeffery Eugenides... **

**Thanks to ShortieJMW, DEFiiANCE, and lizziemagic for reviewing 21.**

It's been years since we've set foot in Shiz, yet the girls linger in our memories still. Sometimes the sound a car horn, or a picture in a magazine will bring back something from that night, and suddenly, we'll find ourselves back in Crage Hall, with Elphaba standing before us, distracting us; as Milla turned cold in the bathroom, and Nessa slipped over the bridge. Sometimes we'll hear something that will remind us of the dances we attended with the girls on our arms, or the nights we slipped off with them to the Wilted Rose Cafe.

The last time we got together, it was at the Wilted Rose, in the back booth we'd occupied the night of the dance, and we spent two hours going over evidence. Since that time, two of our number have been lost to suicide. Fiyero hung himself in the stairwell of his home, the same way Elphaba chose to die. Crope, overdosed on sleeping pills in his home, and was found by his wife. Unable to live without the girls that had changed them so, they met the same ends that had taken the girls' lives all those years ago.

Since the deaths, we gathered all our evidence, and went over it, searching for something we might have missed. Eventually, we put all our findings into a book, and perhaps, you can discover something and unravel the mystery that we have failed to:

"With most people, suicide is like Russian roulette. Only one chamber has a bullet. With those girls, the gun was loaded. A bullet for family abuse. A bullet for genetic predisposition. A bullet for historical malaise. A bullet for inevitable momentum. The other two bullets are impossible to name, but that doesn't mean the chambers were empty.

But this is all a chasing after the wind. The essence of the suicides consisted not of sadness or mystery but simple selfishness. The girls took into their own hands decisions better left to God. They became too powerful to live among us, to self-concerned, to visionary, too blind. What lingered after them was not life, which always overcomes natural death, but the most trivial list of mundane facts: a clock ticking on a wall, a room dim at noon, and the outrageousness of a human being thinking only of herself. Her brain goes dim to all else, but flaming up in precise points of pain, personal injury, lost dreams.

Every other loved one receding as thought across a vast ice floe, shrinking to black dots waving tiny arms, out of hearing. Then, the rope thrown over the beam, the barrel placed in the mouth, the razor laid against the wrist, whatever. They made us participate in their own madness, because we couldn't help but retrace their steps, rethink their thoughts, and see that none of them ledto us. We couldn't imagine the emptiness of a creature who put a razor to her wrists and opened her veins, the emptiness and the calm.

And we had to smear our muzzles in their last traces, of mud marks on the floor, stools kicked out from under them, we had to breathe forever the air of the rooms in which they killed themselves. It didn't matter in the end how old they had been, or that they were girls, but only that we had loved them, and that they hadn't heard us calling, still do not hear us, with our thinning hair and soft bellies, calling them out of those rooms where they went to be alone for all time, alone in suicide, which is deeper than death, and where we will never find the pieces to put them back together.

- _The Virgin Suicides_


End file.
